


Can't Do This Alone

by anonony



Series: Seducing A Hot Alien Prince 101 [18]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alien Sex, Anal Beads, Angst, M/M, Riding, Sweet Sex, hints of Ezor/Acxa, hints of Zethrid/Allura, magic sickness, near-death, tags to be updated
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2019-03-27 21:01:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 28,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13889055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anonony/pseuds/anonony
Summary: While on a mission, Lance is attacked by Haggar, and Lotor must do everything he can to keep him from dying.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ITS THE FINAL FANFIC! (to the tune of final countdown)
> 
> anyway, yeah! prepare for angst, and I'll update tags as necessary, so keep an eye on them.

“Is there anything yet?” Lotor asked, walking into the control room. 

“No,” Coran and Shiro said as one.

Lotor huffed. “They were supposed to have checked in by now.”

“And I’m sure they’ll check in soon,” Coran said, looking over a map and only paying half attention, “From what I understand diplomacy with the Vulanites has been a trial and a half.” 

“But they’re supposed to come back today,” Lotor said, tapping his foot impatiently.

“And they will,” Shiro said, “We’re not robots, sometimes things get off schedule, and you need a little patience.”

Lotor scoffed. He knew he was being unreasonable, but. It was the first time in several months he hadn’t seen Lance in person for days. It was frustrating. 

A light beeped on the screen. “Ah, see? There’s a message from Allura now--” Coran cut himself off as he put the message on to see Allura in distress. Lotor’s blood ran cold. 

“Coran! Send the ship in to intercept us now!” Allura ordered from her seat in the blue lion. 

Coran instantly piloted the ship to start moving. “What happened?” Shiro demanded. 

“The galra attacked Vulan,” she said, “It was a stealth attack, they swooped in and were out before we could form any kind of strike of our own. From what we can tell it was just Haggar and some sentries for backup.” Lotor started shaking.

“What were they after?” Shiro demanded.

“Lance…” Lotor muttered to himself. Shiro looked at him, eyebrow raised.

“They just came and attacked us, the paladins,” Allura said, “Hunk and I were pinned by sentries, but Lance went up against Haggar herself. She...she grabbed his sword and--” She swallowed, her eyes landing on Lotor. “He...he needs a cryopod right away.”

“We’re on our way,” Coran said. 

The screen went dim. Lotor turned on heel, ready to head to his ship. Shiro stopped him, grabbing his arm in his metal hand, the only thing strong enough to stop Lotor’s momentum. “The castle will intercept faster than you can get him and bring him back. The best thing to do is wait.” Lotor clenched his jaw, knowing he was right but needing to move. “How did you know it was Lance?”

Lotor bit his tongue so hard he nearly drew blood. “Because it was Haggar,” he said. “Haggar hates me.”

“All of the empire hates you,” Shiro said, “You’re a fugitive.”

“Haggar especially hates me,” Lotor said, “And she’s no doubt heard of the stunt I pulled on Paquador, which means she knows about my relationship,” He was still shaking. 

“So, what is this, vengeance?” Shiro asked.

Lotor swallowed. “Something like that.”

Shiro took a deep breath. “It’s not your fault.”

“I KNOW it’s not,” Lotor cut him off, “Believe me, my blame is exactly where it needs to be.”

Shiro nodded and let him go. 

 

It was a torturously long time before they intercepted the blue and yellow lions, pulling the red one along like an empty sack. 

Hunk carried him, running from his hangar to the cryopod. Lotor watched him, following along. Lance was clearly unconscious, his armor stripped down, and his hand covered in veins of purple lightning, interweaving and stretching up to his elbow. 

“Alright, everyone stay calm,” Coran said, stepping up to the controls. “Lotor, out of the way.”

Lotor obediently stepped back as Lance was propped up like a puppet inside the pod. Still, even as Coran punched in the proper controls, Lotor couldn’t tear his eyes away. He could see the lightning creeping up his arm. Unconsciously, Lotor put his hand up on the outside of the glass. Lance looked so small. He was always so loud and bright it was weird to think of him being so...small.

The machine beeped, grabbing his attention. Coran’s whole face was furrowed. “What’s happening?”

“It’s not working,” He said. “It’s...It’s not engaging the freezing mechanism. I think whatever that magic thing is, it’s affecting our systems.”

“The cryopods have been able to handle druid injuries before,” Shiro said.

“Well, not this time!” Coran shouted. Lotor was already ripping the cryopod open and holding Lance. Quiznak, his skin was cold. 

“Lotor, can you use magic to--” Allura asked.

“Get me a table!” he demanded. 

Quickly a table was brought to him, and he gently rest Lance on top of it. “Lotor,” Hunk’s voice asked shakily, “Are you sure you can--”

“I don’t know,” Lotor interrupted him, “But...we don’t have much other choice.” 

He felt the eyes of everyone around him, staring him down. He closed his eyes, feeling with his quintessence. 

His eyes snapped open and the world was bathed in yellow light. He ignored the shadows of quintessence surrounding him, focusing on the well of energy lying on the table. It was Lance, he could recognize his energy anywhere, the deep well of emotion and energy and….life. But attached to it was a shadow, a dark energy draining from that well, consuming it. Lotor wouldn’t let that happen. 

He took hold of Lance’s hand. With his very life force, he grabbed hold of the dark energy and wrenched it back, trying to separate the energies from one another. 

It was like trying to demolish a dark cobweb, a cobweb of fire and shadows. Lotor could feel himself burning as he pulled, not willing to let go, but unsure of how well it was working. 

Yes, yes he’s doing it

Lotor wasn’t sure if that was a voice or his own thoughts, but he couldn’t stop, not now. Not even as the dark force took hold of himself, fighting him off trying to destroy HIM now, and--

The world went back to normal just as he hit the ground. All went black. 

 

He woke to a bright light being shined in his eyes. “There he is,” Pidge’s voice said as he flinched away. 

Dark spots floated in front of his eyes as he tried to focus. “You alright buddy?” Hunk asked, as he felt hands trying to help him up. 

He was still shaky, his legs refusing to work under him. A chair appeared behind him and he slumped into it just as he was able to see the concerned looks around him. He was breathing heavily and was sweating worse than a hard day of exercise. “Well that….ALMOST worked,” Matt said, hovering over Lance.

Lotor swallowed looking up. The lightning had been contained to his hand, with just a few spirals breaking past his wrist. Lotor closed his eyes, clutching his head. He’d failed. 

“Can you try again?” Allura asked. 

“Allura,” Coran chastised, “He almost killed himself just now to--”

“I will,” Lotor said, “I...I need a few dobashes,” he swallowed. Shiro brought over a glass of water that he chugged down. He scooted over to Lance. The lightning was already starting to spread up his arm again. 

“If you do it again,” Hunk asked, sitting on the other side of Lance, squeezing his free hand, “Will that cure him?”

Lotor took another breath, looking down at Lance’s face. “I don’t know.”

 

Lotor repeated the process, fighting with the dark energy 3 more times until he couldn’t walk anymore, and was leaning heavily against Lance’s table. Each time he did it, he blacked out for a short while, and woke up minutes later, collapsed over Lance. 

The other paladins had come to watch over him, bringing him food and water. Normally he’d want to reject the gifts they gave him, but he was desperate enough for it, he drank and ate silently, and then held Lance’s hand. Actually, he hadn’t let go of Lance’s hand, not when he blacked out, not when he ate or drank or just rested. He just...he couldn’t.

Lance hadn’t woken up. Every time Lotor fought the dark energy he was able to pull it back, but it managed to progress just slightly further. Lotor kept it from making it up past his arm, but...soon it was hard just keeping it down below his elbow. 

“How is he?” 

He looked up with tired eyes to see Allura walk in. Usually Hunk had been keeping him company. Allura hadn’t been here alone with him yet, though. “He’s…” Lotor said, hearing the weak note in his voice, “He’s...holding steady for now. But…” Lotor looked down at Lance’s peaceful face, “Allura if this reaches his brain...or his heart…”

“I know,” Allura said, taking the seat opposite of him, looking down at Lance. “I want you to know we’re all in this. Hunk suggested we might be able to cut off the affected arm, keep it from spreading.”

“And if we miss any of the tendrils, it could sneak up through his system and kill him without us even knowing before it was too late,” Lotor shot down the suggestion. 

Allura nodded, “We thought something like that would be the case. The Holt’s are looking up possible solutions in our databases, to see if there’s some cure to magic we can find.”

“They won’t find anything,” Lotor said. 

“You don’t know the Holts like I do,” Allura said, “And now there are three of them, so if the solution’s out there--”

“It’s not out there,” Lotor said, ripping his gaze from his boyfriend to meet hers. “I’ve read the druids manuals myself. I read them and studied them for I don’t know how long because they wouldn’t let me keep a calendar, except I knew I was taller when I left than when I came.” He swallowed, never having told much of his past to anyone other than Lance before. “I...I’ve read the manuals,” he massaged his eyes and leaned back in his chair. He was forming a headache. “Princess….this is the most powerful druid in the universe. She’s perfected her craft for 10,000 years. I...I can’t...I’m trying to fight her, but I can’t…” He trailed off. 

He looked down at Lance again. With his free hand he reached up to brush a hand through Lance’s hair. He was still so beautiful. How did he manage to be so beautiful? “He told me, you know,” he said to Allura, “about his crush on you, when he arrived.”

“Jealous?” Allura asked, almost teasing. 

Lotor allowed himself a hollow chuckle. “I’ve always been jealous of you.” He looked up to see the curious and shocked face. “I’m sorry, I’m tired, and I guess more honest than usual. But...you got Alfor as a father. You got to live on Altea, among your people.”

“The Galra are your people too,” Allura interjected.

“And that’s really worked out for me, as you can tell,” Lotor said with a self-depricating smile. He could practically feel the bags below his eyes. “I understand, you know. Why people follow you and not me. Even him,” he nodded at Lance. “He may love me, but...he’d follow you to the end of the universe and back without question. They all would. I’ve never managed that kind of loyalty without trickery or bribing.”

There was a long moment of silence. “That’s because it’s not about loyalty,” Allura finally said, “I don’t look for their allegiance to me. I would die for them. Any of them. I love them and want to protect them.” She leaned over the table, looking at him quizzically. “I think...there’s a part of you that’s just starting to understand that.”

Lotor thought about that, still looking down at Lance. His entire life had been focused on one goal, survival. His wellbeing put above all others. He’d killed for it. He’d abandoned other goals for it. He’d not allowed himself to grow close to anyone for sake of himself. But Lance…

Lance was dying. He was dying right in front of him, and it was Haggar’s fault. But, as much as he wanted to destroy Haggar for daring to take what was his, he’d much rather give his own life if it meant keeping Lance alive.

“You’re right, you know,” Allura said, “You can’t do this yourself. No one can. That’s why we have allies and...and friends, who can help us when we need it.” 

“No one else can do this,” Lotor said, “No one on our side of the war.”

“You once said that if you gave me enough training, maybe I could,” Allura said. “I am high altean as well, and I can do some magic of my own.”

“I would have to teach you,” Lotor said, “And quite frankly, I don’t have the time nor the energy.” 

Allura took a deep breath, “Okay, so, what if I tried doing some of my own healing magic, like the way I heal the balmera?”

“Lance is quite different from a Balmera,” Lotor said. 

“Just--” Allura held herself back from snapping at him, “Just...let me try. What’s the worst that could happen?”

Slowly, Lotor nodded. It wasn’t that he wanted to be snarky and pessimistic, but...he was scared. Quiznak, he was more scared than he’d ever been….

He closed his eyes as he had done before, and focused on fighting the energy again. This time he felt Allura’s energy with him, a glowing white light of something….pure. As Lotor pulled against the dark shadowy fire, Allura’s energy glowed and spread throughout Lance, reinforcing his quintessence. Even as the shadow tried to stick to him, Lotor could feel it was harder for it to re-attach itself. Not impossible, unfortunately, but harder. It’s progress slowed. 

Lotor was pulled out of his energy-vision at the sound of a gasp. He opened his eyes, blinking several times to make sure what he saw was there. 

Lance was blinking his own eyes open, gaze fixed on Lotor. “Hey, babe,” Lance said with a smile, “What’s going on?”

The lightning was still on his arm. The darkness and shadows would not be so easily vanquished, Lotor knew, even as he felt his own energy slip from him, ready to black out again. Still, Lotor fought that urge and forced himself to stay awake, just to see Lance’s smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance is awake now, but he's not out of the woods yet

Lotor let Shiro and Allura take over the explanations, resting on Lances chest. He was pretty sure he fell asleep a couple of times, or maybe he just lost track of the conversation. At some point, Lances free hand ended up stroking through Lotors hair.

Once Lance was all caught up it was time to drain the dark energy from his arm again. Lotor fell asleep again almost immediately, though it was admittedly easier with Allura’s help. When he woke up, he and Lance were alone. “Hey sleepyhead,” Lance said, smiling down on him, still stroking his hair, “When’s the last time you used a brush?”

Lotor lifted his head, “The morning you came in,” he said, hearing how croaky his own voice was. He looked at his own hair. It’s typical shine had gone down significantly. “Quiznak, and I haven’t washed it either.”

“I keep telling you, if you wash every day, you’ll deplete your natural oils,” He quirked his mouth into a smile.

“Maybe for humans,” Lotor said. Lance rolled his eyes. “How’re you feeling?”

Lance sighed. “Weird. My hand’s a little numb.” He nodded at the hand Lotor was holding. “When you were doing that...weird glowy eye thing…”

“My eyes glowed?” Lotor asked.

“Dude, your pupils and irisis just straight up disappear,” Lance said, “Anyway, when you were doing that, it felt...like someone was ripping off a really stubborn band-aid.”

“Did it hurt?” Lotor asked, flooded with concern. 

“No, no,” Lance said, but Lotor could see he was lying. “Not really, anyway. Just. Weird.”

Lotor nodded, resting his head on Lance’s chest again. He could hear his heartbeat. It was a good sound. “I’ll find a way,” Lotor said, “I’ll find a way to stop this.”

Lance stroked his hair again. “You going to tell me now?” 

Lotor quirked an eyebrow, “Tell you what?”

“Whatever it is you’re not telling the others,” Lance said, raising a knowing eyebrow at Lotor, “It’s you babe, don’t tell me there’s not a secret.”

Lotor stared him down, but Lance held firm. Reluctantly, Lotor sighed. “I...This…” he held up Lance’s injured hand, “This isn’t about vengeance. At least, I don’t think it is. I think this is Haggar’s way of….summoning me.”

“Summoning?” Lance asked. 

Lotor nodded. “If I were her, I can’t think of a better way to get me to come to her than using the one thing I’ve loved in my life and infecting him with something only she can heal.”

“Aww, babe,” Lance said. “No.”

Lotor frowned at him. “No?”

“No,” Lance repeated, “Under no circumstances are you to bring me to Haggar.”

Lotor shook his head in disbelief. “I have no intention of bringing you to Haggar.”

“Good,” Lance said, “Because you know what happens when you do that?”

“I’m not going to--”

“Not only do you get killed because, and I hate to remind you of this, but Zarkon wants you dead--”

“I know very well what--” Lotor tried to interrupt, but Lance steamrolled him.

“But you will be handing over me, your love, and a Voltron paladin so that I can be ransomed or worse. Do you understand?” Lance stared Lotor down, and Lotor wasn’t sure, but it seemed like Lance was trying to intimidate him. 

Lotor swallowed. “I don’t want to take you to Haggar.”

Lance stared at him suspiciously, but eventually swallowed and let it go. “I missed you.” He finally said. 

Lotor stood on shaky legs to kiss him on the mouth. “I missed you too.”

 

They kept up the cycle for two more days, Lotor barely leaving his side. With Allura’s help, it felt like they were finally making progress. Slow progress, but progress all the same. 

On the third day, Keith arrived. “Hey Sharpshooter,” he said, walking in. 

“Samurai!” Lance said back, smiling, “What are you doing here?” 

Keith and Lotor exchanged wary looks. Finally, Lotor nodded to him in greeting, and Keith stepped forward, sitting on the other side of Lance. “Shiro told me you were sick. I told him you were probably faking it so you can nap instead of fighting.”

“Aw, and you came all this way just to prove it,” Lance said, smirking, “Typical.”

Keith snorted and punched his arm. “Well, you seem as obnoxious as ever. Clearly you’re fine.”

“Clearly,” Lance joked, “I just got a sweet new tattoo, and everyone’s overreacting.” He lifted his affected arm, the hand hanging limp. 

Keith flinched at the sight of his arm. “You should try laser removal,” he suggested, getting a laugh from Lance. Keith’s gaze moved up to Lotor. “You look more awful than usual.”

Lotor rolled his eyes at him. It hurt, but it was worth it. “Oh, lay off,” Lance instructed, “He’s been taking real good care of me.”

Lance smiled at him warmly. Lotor smiled back. He looked up at Keith. “Are you here to do anything useful?” he demanded.

“I’m here to be with my friend,” Keith said.

“Really?” Lotor said, suspicious, “The Blade just lets you go because your friend is sick?”

“Hey, lets not underestimate things,” Lance said, “I nearly died.”

Keith ignored him, “I actually care about people, which I know is a foreign concept to you, but--”

“You don’t leave the Blade just because you feel like it,” Lotor sat up realization hitting him, “You’re here to replace him.”

Keith looked between Lotor and Lance. “Just until Lance is better.” Lotor scoffed, “Just until he’s on his feet, it’s dangerous not having Voltron in commission.”

“I suppose you’d know better than most wouldn’t you?” Lotor sneered.

“Hey, I came to help!” Keith said.

“It’s fine,” Lance muttered quietly.

“No, it isn’t,” Lotor said, “He’ll be fine in just a few days, we don’t need you.”

“Really?” Keith said, “and if someone attacks, who’s going to pilot the red lion? You? And your stringy ass hair?”

“Guys…” 

“The other lions can handle any attacks right now,” Lotor said, “and by the way I’ve done more to protect this ship than you have in the last few months.” 

“Oh, right, I’m so sorry, I know you’ve been missing me this whole time,” Keith said sarcastically.

“What I’m saying,” Lotor said, sneering, “Is that we didn’t need you before and we don’t now,”

“Guys!” Lance shouted. 

Lotor and Keith both looked down, Lance was gasping for breath, eyes rolling into the back of his head. The lightning was spiking up his arm. “Lance!” Keith said.

Lotor leaped into action, grabbing Lance’s hand and focusing his quintessence, nevermind he hadn’t fully recovered from the last time he’d done this. “GET ALLURA,” He shouted, his voice not sounding entirely real.

This time it felt more like he was fighting an ocean than a shadow, the dark energy sprinting across Lance’s skin. Lotor used every inch of stamina he had to haul it back, or at least freeze it in it’s tracks, but it was like a flame burning through the kindling of Lance’s quintessence. 

After longer than he was comfortable with, a flash of white light came to support him. Allura. The bright light managed to push on the other side as Lotor pulled, freezing the shadow in it’s tracks….but unable to pull it back any further. 

That was all Lotor could process before he blacked out again. 

 

He woke up on a table of his own, Allura, Coran and Sam Holt standing over him. “This whole process is draining him,” Sam said, as Allura passed her hands over him. Her hands glowed with a familiar white light, “If he keeps this up, he’ll die.”

“Lance,” Lotor muttered. 

“Lance is fine, Lotor,” Coran said, “It was you we were worried about losing. The healing pods are still down, but Allura helped patch you up for now.”

Lotor’s gaze fell on Allura, who didn’t look overly comfortable with being Lotor’s savior. Lotor looked past her to Lance, lying on a table beside him, and smiling once he saw Lotor was okay. His entire right arm was covered in lightning, creeping past his shoulders. His fingers were such a dark purple they were mainly black. Hunk and Pidge were perched over him, each scanning him with Altean equipment. “So,” Matt said, standing off to the side with Shiro and Keith, “Lotor keeps Lance alive, Allura keeps Lotor alive….what happens when Allura needs someone?”

“It’s not going to come to that,” Allura said. “Something happened this time, he hasn’t had an attack like this before, and I want to know precisely what that was. Pidge?”

“Hold on,” Pidge said, as Lotor sat up on his table, swinging his legs off to the side, “I may have something but….I--I don’t want to say in case I’m wrong.”

“Spit it out,” Keith demanded, “It’s kinda getting life-or-death in here.”

Pidge ignored him, and went over to Hunk. They compared scanner outputs, and then exchanged distressed glances. “It…” Hunk said, “It looks like he’s been poisoned.”

“As an effect of the druid thingy?” Matt asked. 

Pidge shook her head, “No, this was separate. I mean, related, but...from samples of his blood there’s trace elements of some altean compounds which, when combined, serve to damper someone’s natural quintessence, if I’m reading this right.” 

Lotor’s eyes closed at the news. “With his quintessence dampened….The druid magic might have consumed him in ticks.”

Lance swallowed, looking a little pale at the news. “Well….glad that didn’t happen.”

“How could he have been poisoned?” Keith said, “The only ones to have access to him since his injury are in this room.” 

There was an awkward moment where everyone looked between each other, silently wondering. “That’s ridiculous,” Lance countered, “Everyone here is my friend, why would anyone of them want to hurt me?”

“Unless…” Hunk said, looking around uneasily, “Someone here isn’t who they say….” His gaze flitted over to Keith.

“What, me?” Keith said, “I just got here!” 

“Yeah,” Pidge said, “RIGHT before Lance had his attack. Convenient.”

“And way too soon to have actually done anything!” Keith protested, “What about Prince Galra over there, he’s been with Lance the whole time.”

“I’m the only thing keeping him ALIVE!” Lotor protested. 

“Not the ONLY thing,” Allura said.

“I just nearly DIED saving him from this thing,” Lotor said, “Aren’t there easier ways for me to have killed him? What about the recent-prisoner here,” He nodded over to Sam. “It’s not uncommon for Galra to convert their prisoners.”

“Me?” Sam said, “I don’t even know any of this Altean stuff. How would I have poisoned him?”

“The Druids can be very educational,” Lotor said, squinting at him, “Especially if you made a deal with them, and they allowed you to be rescued.”

“Hey, you leave my dad out of this!” Matt yelled, “He makes an important point, how many people even know how to make this poison? Coran?”

“You’re accusing me?” Coran said, “Why would I ever try to hurt Lance?”

“Why would ANY of us try to hurt Lance,” Allura said, “Something here doesn’t line up.”

“You would also be under the list of people who’d know, Princess,” Pidge snarled accusatory.

“I--” Allura said, affronted, “I would never! I saved Lance too, I couldn’t--”

“STOP IT!” Lance screamed over them all. “Just….just stop, for one second.” Lance struggled to sit up, supporting himself on his one good arm. “Shiro?”

The attention in the room went to the one person who’d been silent through the fighting. Shiro had turned away from them, wandering aimlessly further into the room. “Shiro?” Keith repeated.

That at least prompted Shiro to turn to the side, just enough for them to watch his horrified look in profile. “I didn’t mean--I mean, I didn’t even think….”

“Shiro?” Matt said, still trying to get his attention, taking a few steps closer to him, “What are you saying?”

Shiro swallowed, looking up at Lance. “It was...it was all so ordinary. I mean, it just….it felt like part of the process...get a glass from the shelf, walk over to the sink, turn it on...fill it with water….” His gaze fell to the floor, and Lotor recognized the look of shame when he saw it, “Next thing I knew I just...walked to the medicine cabinet...I didn’t know what the vials were, I didn’t know what they’d do, I just...I didn’t even think about it…”

“Shiro,” Allura said, shaking her head, like she couldn’t believe it, like she could will this all away as some big joke.

Shiro looked at his hands, both human and metal. “I think….I think I need to be locked up.” 

The room froze, no one sure as to what they should do. Hunk finally was the one to step up, and take Shiro’s arm. Shiro jerked in surprise, and for an instant, they all recognized his look like he was going to fight. Hunk held firm, and Shiro quickly remembered that he’d been the one to request this. He hung his head, letting Hunk take him away. 

The room was left in uncomfortable silence.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some very difficult conversations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to post this in the morning but I have to get up ridiculously early so. Here.

A few hours later, Lotor and Allura completed another healing cycle for Lance. They kept the dark energy from spreading anywhere important but...it was still progressing. 

No one spoke much after Shiro’s confession. They mostly stayed huddled in the cryopod room, gaining strength from one another. Or, that’s the explanation Lance gave when Lotor asked. 

Coran had helped Hunk secure Shiro, and with interrogating him. They returned looking harrowed. “Well,” Coran said, breaking the spell everyone was under, “He managed to describe to me which vials he took, and I checked. They are missing, and they are the ones Pidge found in Lance’s system.” Lance hung his head, still sitting up with his arm hanging limply beside him. Lotor sat on the table next to him, putting his arm around him. “After some further questioning, he also remembered and confessed to tampering with the cryopods.”

Matt winced, like he’d been physically attacked. He and Allura had taken to hiding in the back corner. What they were discussing, no one was really sure. “Why?” Allura asked, taking his hand and squeezing. 

Hunk cleared his throat. “From what he says...assuming he’s telling the truth...he doesn’t know,” Hunk rocked back and forth, “He didn’t recognize the Altean compounds for the poison, and...He has all of Shiro’s memories that I can tell. I didn’t know him before Voltron.” 

“So, what,” Pidge said, “Is it just coding in his arm? Taking over when he least expects?”

“If it even is the real Shiro,” Lance said, “Let's be honest, he’s gone missing often enough, anything might have happened, at any of those times.”

There was a loud bang behind them. Jumping, they all saw Keith had managed to punch a dent in the high tech Altean castle. Sam was over to him in seconds, “Easy, sonny.”

“Exactly which part of this is supposed to be easy?” Keith demanded, boiling over, “Talking about...brain coding, and….and fake Shiros and….”

“Calm down,” Sam said. “We need to focus on a goal.”

“Yes,” Lotor agreed, “Because no matter if that’s Shiro or not, it doesn’t change the fact we need to help with Lance.” 

Lance nodded. “Keith,” Lance said, “You know what you have to do, right?” he asked.

Keith swallowed, taking deep breaths. “I….will go call Kolivan. Tell him I need to stay with Voltron to pilot the Black Lion for...for a while.” He stormed out of the room.

Lance nodded. “Team science,” He addressed Hunk, Keith, Matt, Coran, and Sam, “We need to work on looking at Shiro’s arm and seeing about that coding thing you were talking about. If you don’t want to do that, you can stay focused on looking for, you know, a cure for me.” 

Pidge took her brothers arm and peeled him away from Allura, as all of the science oriented people made their way out of the room. 

“You,” Lance said, turning on Lotor. Lotor blinked in confusion. “This is something I never thought I’d have to tell you, but you stink. You haven’t cleaned yourself properly in days, or taken care of yourself in any measurable way. I want you out of here for at least a varga.”

Lotor scoffed at him. “This isn’t the time. If something happens--”

“If something happens, Allura will be here to help,” Lance said, gesturing to where Allura was standing in the corner, “And she’ll call you, and I know you’ll be here in ticks.”

Lotor pursed his lips, preparing all of his arguments, “But what if that’s ticks too late?”

“I’ll be fine,” Lance assured Lotor, “Now go, one Varga.”

“But--”

“Out!” Lance nearly shouted at him. 

Reluctantly, Lotor slunk out of the room. 

Behind in the room, Lance turned to Allura. “And now,” he said, “For a very, very….VERY uncomfortable conversation.”

 

Lotor had never showered so fast in his life. Usually he lingered, taking pleasure in the sensation of water against his skin, but this time he barely passed soap and shampoo over himself before jumping out and drying off. And putting product in his hair because he wasn’t an animal. 

Once he was finished, he’d barely spent any of his required time away from Lance. At the same time, he didn’t want to be occupied or asleep if Lance suddenly needed him. So, he just sat on Lance’s bed, looking around Lance’s possessions and altogether completely incapable of thinking of anything other than Lance. 

Finally, he decided, he could at least go and try and be closer to Lance even if he didn’t go into the room, just in case he got called he could run in faster. 

Sitting in the hallway outside Lance’s room turned into sitting in the hallway slightly further, which turned into going to a hallway further than that, which finally lead him to the hallway outside the cryopod room. That was when he heard sniffling. 

It wasn’t Lance, he recognized that right away. It sounded more like Allura. “I know, I know,” THAT voice was Lance. Most likely comforting her. “Hey, c’mon, stay with me here.”

“S-Sorry,” Allura muttered, “Sorry, just...first Shiro...and now this…”

“I know,” Lance said, “But we have limited time here so, lets go over the list. We’ve got Dad, Mom, Abuela, Marco, Luis, Veronica, one for blanket extended family, did we get Marco’s kids?”

“Yeah,” Allura said, still sniffling away her tears, “One to cover the twins and Marco’s wife.” 

“Excellent,” Lance said.

“We shouldn’t even be having this conversation,” Another voice said, this one definitely Keith’s. He must have been back from his call with Kolivan, and he did not sound like he was in a good mood. “It feels too much like...like…”

“Giving up?” Lance suggested. Their silence confirmed it, “I’m not giving up. I’m just,” He took a deep breath, “Being prepared.”

“A little too prepared, if you ask me,” Keith said. 

“You think this is easy for me?” Lance snapped back, “You think I WANT to die? ‘Cause let me tell you right now, I don’t,” His voice broke at the last word, and Lotor recognized that voice. Lance was about to cry too, “But the best thing I can do….the ONLY thing I can do, is make sure my affairs are in order. That’s what people do on their deathbed.”

There was silence again. Lotor was fairly certain he’d frozen solid. He didn’t move, not a single muscle, and was quite sure he couldn’t, listening in. 

“Do--” Allura started, but had to stop to clear her throat, “Do you want to list messages to the other paladins?”

“No,” Lance said, “I want to do those in person. Maybe when Lotor’s sleeping.”

“And Lotor?” Keith asked, “How’re you gonna tell this to him?”

More silence. “I can’t say this to him. He--he won’t accept it, and he’ll do something stupid. He...listen, it’s very important that he doesn’t think I’m going to die until….after.” 

Keith sighed heavily. “And then what?”

“Then it’s going to be on you two,” he said. “Look, I know...believe me, I actually do know that he has a tendency to dishonesty. But I’ve spent a great deal of time trying to break through his walls, and I’m worried that once I...you know...that the walls are going to go right back up.” Lance took a deep breath. “He’s lost a lot, something that I know both of you can relate to. Keith, you’re part Galran, like him. Allura, he’s one of the last Alteans in the universe. He’ll need you guys. And if you’re there for him, I know he’ll be a really great asset.”

“Asset?” Keith said, “What kind of asset do you mean? What else can he do, besides---oh.” Keith paused. “You...you want him to take over for Red.”

There was another silence. Lance started, “Look--”

“No,” Allura said, “No! I’m not letting him be a paladin--”

“It’s not something I’d thought of before today,” Lance said, “But with Shiro….you know whatever that deal is….honestly you could do worse. He has the instinct, he’s a great fighter, he’s intelligent, and if you get his trust, I mean really, he could be the best right hand you could ask for.”

“I am not letting Zarkon’s son in my father’s lion!” Allura nearly shouted. 

Outside the room, Lotor breathed heavily. Not since he was a child had he dared dream of being a Voltron Paladin. And….to take Lance’s place….he could barely dare think it. He didn’t want it. He didn’t want anything to do with a Voltron that Lance wasn’t a part of. 

“We can’t decide now anyway,” Keith said, “If...IF something happens, well test out new potential pilots same as we did with Black. With the rebellion in full swing we have...we have options. We’ll deal with that when we get there.”

More silence. Lotor could only imagine the staring contests happening in there. 

“Alright,” Lance said, quietly, “Alright, we should finish up. Lotor will be back any tick.”

Keith and Allura made affirmative noises. There were a few quiet noises that might have been muffled sobs. Lotor was slowly melting and took a step forward, walking into the room. 

Lance smiled his usual brilliant smile, and it scared Lotor how well Lance had learned to keep a lying face. Lotor wondered if he’d picked that up from him. “Hey babe,” Lance said, looking at a ticker. “5 decadobashes, and 23 ticks. You sped up the clock there by 9 dobashes. You’re lucky I’m forgiving.”

Lotor didn’t trust himself to speak, so he just smiled at him and shrugged. 

“Come here,” Lance said, “Let me smell you, make sure you actually washed.” Lance beckoned him with his working hand. 

Lotor stepped forward, wrapping Lance up in his arms, holding him as tightly as he dared. He remembered, in that instance, every single time he’d held Lance in his arms like this, and knew it was the best thing he had ever, or would ever feel again. He closed his eyes, willing the tears forming not to fall. 

Lance sniffed dramatically. “Did you use my shampoo?”

Lotor swallowed, “I’ve run out of mine.”

Lance chuckled into his chest. “I’ll get you some more, next time we hit the swap moon.” 

Lotor nodded, rocking Lance gently in his arms. He looked over Lance’s head to see Keith and Allura quietly talking over to the side. Sensing his stare, they both looked over to him, holding eye contact for a few ticks. He was an expert at reading people. He prided himself on it. And he knew, watching them, that they were both despairing.

He squeezed Lance just a bit tighter.

 

He and Allura drained what they could of Lance’s dark energy, then Lotor took a short nap laying beside Lance. When he woke up again, Keith and Allura were gone, and Lance was asleep.

Lotor watched him sleeping. Lance always looked so beautiful when he slept. His profile was the perfect set of soft curves. His skin glowed in just the right places. He wondered if there were any humans on Earth who were quite so beautiful. He doubted it. It really was something unique to Lance. 

“I know what you want from me,” Lotor said in a low voice, not raising it enough to wake him. “You have an idea in your head of some….great man that I could become.” He tapped his foot slowly, “A hero. You’ve...always believed in the best in me. And maybe you’re right, maybe there is some untapped potential I could break, but….” His breath caught in his throat, “But I can’t do it alone. I can’t do this alone.”

Lotor reached out and took Lance’s lightning covered hand. It didn’t react, laying completely limp in his hold. “Moving on is the responsible thing to do. Acceptance. Recovery. All of that kind of….emotionally healthy quiznak.” Lotor took a shaky breath. “I’ve moved on from every tragedy in my life. I’ve focused on myself, I’ve learned, I’ve...I’ve turned my losses into gains and taken power when I could so I could never….never get hurt like this again.

“Now, don’t argue with me,” He said to Lance’s sleeping form, “I know what you’re going to say. Connections with people, allies, friendships...love. It’s a strength. And that’s true, it’s so, so true. I never knew that before I met you, but you fought and you proved me wrong. I’m so much stronger with you by my side.”

He looked off to the side, to the doors. “It’s not your job to be my strength. You’re not my moral center, my emotional support. I mean, you are all those things, but its not your job to be, you don’t OWE it to me. But I just. I don’t know what I’ll do without all of that. Without you. Because as much as you good guys cry of how love is a strength, it IS also a weakness. It just is. Haggar knew it. My fa…” He swallowed, “Zarkon knows it. And I know it. This...this right now is my weakness. And I’m so, so sorry, but I’m not strong enough--”

A tear leaked out of his eyes. He hung his head to try and hide the tears from anyone who’d see, realizing only afterwards there wasn’t anyone to see him. Still, he wiped them away, but they stubbornly popped up again. “I’m not strong enough to resist.” He swallowed, standing up, and heading over to the medicine cabinet. “I see an opportunity to save you, and...I know, I KNOW it’s a terrible idea. And it’ll probably end up getting us both captured.” He grabbed what he needed. “But at least you’ll be alive.”

He took the vial he was looking for and poured it into a needle. He made sure there weren’t bubbles, took it over, and injected his boyfriend and love of his life. That should keep him asleep for a few vargas.

 

He carried Lance with both arms, which made it more difficult to operate any controls on doors or anything of the like, but it was the best way to keep Lance cradled to his chest. 

As he suspected, the Voltron crew hadn’t taken any thought yet to keeping people out of the one cell on the ship. It had been kind of a big day, so they hadn’t done anything but lock the proverbial door. 

Also as he suspected, there was one person still not asleep on the ship. Shiro, or whoever he was, sat awake, staring at the walls of his cell. He looked up as Lotor walked down to him. “I’m ready,” Lotor said, “I’ll follow you.”

Shiro frowned in confusion. “Follow?” he said, “Follow where?”

“I’m not talking to you,” Lotor said, “I’m talking to whoever’s watching.”

Shiro swallowed and stood up. Carefully balancing Lance in his arms, Lotor hit the controls. As proud as the Holt’s were of their security, Lotor had long ago learned their tricks. The forcefield came down, and Shiro stepped out. “I don’t…” Shiro said, “I don’t want to do this.”

Lotor could sympathize. A part of him even wanted to. But one quick look at Lance reminded him of what was important here. “You don’t really have a choice, do you?”

Shiro hung his head, his feet moving forward with little of his own control. Lotor walked in step with him, guiding them to his ship where Shiro--where Haggar would lead them directly to where they had to go.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lotor brings Lance to Haggar

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these chapters are getting shorter but I'm tired sorry here

Lance stirred. Lotor had lay him down at the floor of his cockpit. There wasn’t much room in Lotor’s ship, it wasn’t designed for comfort, but Lotor swiveled seeing him. 

The lightning had spread down his right side. Lotor had focused his efforts on making sure it didn’t hit any vital organs, but there wasn’t much more he could do to stop it spreading. “Hey,” Lotor said, “how are you feeling?” he said, leaning down over him. 

“Lotor?” Lance asked, hazy, “What’s happening...what...where are we?” He tried to sit up, but Lotor held him back down. 

“Whoa, slow down,” Lotor urged, “The sedative’s still working it’s way out of your system.” 

“Sedative?” Lance asked, “What’s going--did you drug me?”

“Just a little,” Lotor said, cradling his head off the floor, “I’m sorry but it was necessary.”

Lotor squinted at him in confusion, then looked around the cockpit. “This isn’t the castle.”

Lotor hung his head. “No.”

Lance closed his eyes pursing his lips in anger, “Please tell me the Holts found some cure and you’re taking me to it?”

“Close,” Lotor said, “Except the Holts didn’t tell me about it.”

Lance glared at him, “Lotor--”

“I know you don’t like this,” Lotor started, but Lance cut him off. 

“You’re DAMN RIGHT I don’t!” Lance said, “I can’t believe YOU of all people are going to trust Haggar! The only person in the universe you hate more than Zarkon himself.” 

“I don’t trust her,” Lotor said, “But I know she can save you.”

“Great,” Lance said, “She’ll save me just in time to throw me in a gladiator arena. And you at Zarkon’s feet.”

“I won’t go down without a fight,” Lotor said, “But if I don’t do this you’ll die.”

“Then I’ll die!” Lance shouted at him, “I’m a voltron paladin, that’s the job.”

“In a battle,” Lotor said, “In defending the universe or fighting off evil, not…” He took a deep breath, “Not because you chose the wrong boyfriend. And not when I can do something about it.”

Lance looked up at him sadly. “I thought you didn’t regret things.”

Lotor swallowed. “I’m learning all kinds of emotions recently.”

Lance took a deep breath, reaching up with his good arm to cradle Lotor’s face. “Turn the ship around.” Lotor shook his head. “Lotor--”

“I can’t,” Lotor said, “And not just because I don’t want to.” 

Lance squinted up at him, then looking down at the pilot’s chair. The empty pilot chair. “Lotor, who’s flying the ship?” 

“The ship has multiple possible control centers,” Lotor said. Lance frowned at him. “Shiro’s piloting.”

Lance chewed on his lip. “Shiro or—“

“Not Shiro, as it happens.” Lotor corrected. 

Lance sighed and threw back his head. “How is it that getting poisoned isn’t the lowest point of my day?”

Lotor stroked his hand through his hair Lance flinched away. “Are you breaking up with me again?” 

Lance sighed. “No,” He said, “Even if I did, I don’t think it’d matter much anyway. We’re going into the belly of the beast and…” he took a shuddering breath. “I’m scared. Lotor, I’m--I’m terrified.”

Lotor scooped him up into his arms. “I know,” he said, rocking him, “I know, I am too. I’ll protect you.” Lance shuddered, burying his head in Lotor’s chest. “Know whatever happens, I love you.”

Lance nodded. “I do know.” Lotor leaned down to kiss his mouth, "You realize doing things out of love doesn't make it automatically okay, right?" Lotor nodded. "Then....I love you too."

 

They arrived at a ship, a lone Galra ship. His sensors read no life signs, but when Lotor reached out with his own energy, he could feel one presence. Haggar was on board. Just Haggar. There were probably sentries as well but, she came alone. Interesting. 

Once they were close enough, the Galra ship grabbed hold of theirs by tractor beam, pulling them into the loading dock. Lotor carried Lance to the bay doors, watching silently as they were pulled inside. 

Shiro came over to stand next to them. “Shiro,” Lance said, looking over to him, “If there’s...if there’s anything left of the real Shiro...Take me back and drive this ship out of here, now.”

Shiro stared ahead, silent. He looked like he was about to cry. 

“Don’t be too hard on him,” Lotor urged Lance, “Haggar has...an annoying knack of playing people against their own interests.”

“Like you?” Lance asked, accusing. 

Lotor let all the air in his lungs out through his nose. “Where do you think I learned it from?”

The ship stopped moving, and the docking bay doors closed. Lotor opened his ship, stepping out. “She’s in her laboratory,” Shiro said. 

“Well, that’s not creepy,” Lance said. 

Lotor nodded to Shiro, letting him take the lead. Sentries lined the walls, waiting patiently. It was eerie after so long to be going through a Galra ship without fighting his way.

Inside the room was all manner of pods and machines that would give the strongest warriors nightmares, and the witch herself, patiently waiting for them. “You took longer than I expected,” She said, “Were you really so willing to risk everything?”

Lotor stared her down. “Just fix him,” he instructed. 

Haggar nodded. “Certainly. Lie him here, please,” she indicated the table in front of her.

Lance shook his head, but Lotor carried him forward and lay him down. “I still want my arm after this,” Lance hissed at her.

Haggar chuckled. “Worry not, Paladin. I’ll keep you whole.” 

Lance looked nervous at Lotor. Lotor tried to be comforting but he wasn’t sure he was successful.

Haggar waved her hands over Lances body and the lightning instantly started to drain away. Watching carefully, Lotor leaned over to Shiro. “You want to leave here, right?” Confused, Shiro nodded. Lotor leaned in and whispered something neither Haggar nor Lance could hear

Shiro opened his mouth, possibly to ask questions, but Lotor wasn’t interested in answering. Instead he stepped forward, holding Lances hand as the last of the lightning was drained from him. “There,” Haggar said, “that’s better, isn’t it?”

Lance lifted his arm, wiggling his fingers to test them. “I’d thank you, but you kinda caused it, so…” Lance said. 

Haggar smiled, and it thoroughly creeped out both Lance and Lotor. Lance jumped off the table backing away. Haggar didn’t try to stop him.

In a flash, Lotor drew his sword and struck it across Haggars neck. The blade passed through with no resistance as Haggar disappeared.”Shiro!” Lotor yelled, chasing down where Haggar had reappeared. 

Shiro grabbed Lances arm. “C’mon,” He said, pulling him back to the bay.

“Wait,” Lance pulled back, “not without Lotor,”

Lotor leaped off the walls, striking at Haggars shape, only for the image of her to split in two. He slashed them both and the image split into two more. Soon Haggar was multiplying all around him. 

He looked past the Haggars to see Lance struggling against Shiros arm. Lance had no weapons, but was still pushing to join the fight. “GO!” He yelled at Shiro.

Shiro picked Lance up and dragged him away, “No!” Lance cried out. Lotor didn’t—-couldn’t pay him mind anymore as he fought the images of Haggar, desperately attempting to strike her down. 

Lotor destroyed the images one by one, until he saw the real one, across the room from him. “You don’t need to fight,” she said, “your mate and the clone have fulfilled their purposes. I have no need for them any longer, they can go.”

Lotor ignored her words continuing to strike, only for her to disappear and reappear again. “I can do this all day,” she said.

Still he ran after her, desperate to defeat her even though there was no hope. Oddly enough, she wasn’t striking back. Maybe she was just waiting for him to tire out.

She appeared next to a screen, pressing a button. “There, see?” An image came up of Lotors ship, flying away, “your love has made it to safety.”

Lotor looked between her and the screen. “How do I know that’s not a trick?”

She sighed. “I suppose you don’t. Except in your knowledge that I’m not after him. Destroy one Paladin, they’ll just replace him with another, there’s no point.”

He took a shuddering breath, still holding his sword in defensive position. “Is this the part where you turn me into Zarkon?” He asked. 

“No.” She said firmly, stepping forward, “I don’t want to harm you. I came to help.”

“Help?” He scoffed, “help me? Don’t be absurd.”

“You must believe me,” her voice taking on a different tone than he’d ever heard, less raspy, more...warm. If that was even possible. “I know you have reason not to, but...but you must remember...you must remember something…”

“Remember what,” he snarled at her, “how you took me? Tortured me? Killed my mother, brainwashed my father?”

“Your recollection of events is severely warped,” Haggar said, walking closer to him still. “Not surprising. Until recently my own memory was gone. But I know now.” Another step. “I know who I am.” Another step. “And most importantly, I know who you are.”

She stood at the end of his sword. He knew if he thrust, he could hit her chest, but she would only disappear again. “Who...are you?” He asked. 

She removed her hood. Instead of the usual purple skin and glowing yellow eyes, she looked up at him with altean eyes, and brown skin, not unlike how he looked when he used shapeshifting too appear more human. She was still old and falling apart but seemed so much more….like a person. “It’s me, Lotor,” she said stepping past the end of his sword into his personal space. “My son...It’s your mother.”

 

“Turn back,” Lance ordered Shiro, leaning over his pilots chair. 

“If I do, we’ll all die,” Shiro said, “Lotor knew that.”

“She’s going to kill him!” Lance shouted at him, shaking in rage, “She—he sacrificed himself, we have to save him!”

“We turn back, he’ll have sacrificed himself for nothing,” Shiro said. “We’ll go out, get reinforcements from Voltron, and then go back to save him.”

“By the time we get Voltron he’ll be dead!” Lance shouted at him, hearing his own voice crack.

Shiro swallowed. “Maybe not,” he said. Lance scoffed. “I’m serious! Lotor...whispered something to me. While you were being healed.”

Lance frowned at him. “What? What did he say?”

“He said he’d keep her distracted as long as he could, so I could get away…” Shiro said, “and...he mentioned...he mentioned Acxa.”

Lances brow furrowed. “Acxa?” He asked. “What about her?” 

Shiro shook his head. “I’m not sure. He just...he said she’d know what to do.”

 

They intercepted Lion Castle fairly easily, as after they realized Lance and Lotor had gone missing, Hunk used his voltron finder to locate him. 

Lance babbled what had happened, starting to break down as he realized Lotor might be dead or worse by now. Keith used his special Blade of Marmora communicator to contact Acxa, bringing her, Ezor, and Zethrid up on screen. “Acxa!” Lance shouted at her, “Lotors been captured by Haggar!”

Ezor and Zethrids eyes went wide. Acxa, however, just looked irritated, her shoulders falling and her face screwed up into a frown, “Of quiznaking course he has.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Acxa tells the paladins Lotor's true plans.

“Honestly, sometimes you just have to ask yourself, ‘where did I go wrong?’ ‘What led to this?’” Acxa pauses long enough that Lance wondered if she was still talking to herself, of if she was actually asking them, “is it even worth it, after all?”

Acxa, Ezor, and Zethrid has intercepted, boarding their special comet ship. It sat next to Lotors, looking almost identical. Ezor and Zethrid seemed just about as confused as the Paladins about what was going on, which was equally disturbing and comforting.

As soon as she boarded, Acxa marched up to the control room and started plugging in coordinates, mumbling to herself. “Like, I know he saved my life and taught me everything I know, but in the end, at what cost?” 

“Acxa,” Ezor asked, desperately following her, “Are you….are you saying you went back to working for Lotor?”

Acxa had the decency to look guilty. “Technically speaking I never stopped,” She said, still pushing buttons. She looked up at Allura for a moment, “Would you explain things to them? I’m kind of busy at the moment.”

“I’d love to, but I have absolutely no clue what’s going on,” Allura said, watching her. It was such a wonder watching the confused interaction, Lance almost forgot the overwhelming life-and-death situation surrounding his boyfriend. Almost.

Acxa looked up at her in shock, then looked between her and Lance. “What do you mean you don’t know?” she demanded. “Lotor didn’t tell you?”

Lance felt his heart sink. Lotor was keeping secrets from him? Big secrets? “Tell me what?” he said, his voice croaky.

Acxa looked around to the other paladins and members of team Voltron (minus Shiro who’d taken himself back to his cell, just in case Haggar started paying attention to him again.) They all stared at her in various phases of confusion and irritation themselves. Finally her face fell into her hands. “One job, he had ONE JOB!”

“What job?” Allura demanded.

Acxa sighed, and finished plugging in coordinates. “Wormhole here. I can show you.” 

Allura scowled, “I’m not just going to--”

“Allura,” Lance said, his voice still not working properly from crying over Lotor, “Please…”

Allura pursed her lips in irritation, but grabbed the navigation pillars and brought up a wormhole. Acxa turned to the rest of the group. “Last time we were here, Ezor and Zethrid told you about the Sincline ships.”

Pidgee nodded, pushing up her glasses. “The ships you were making out of the comet.”

“One Lotor took, and one we got,” Zethrid agreed, “And he was supposed to work on a third, but that process got interrupted by Haggar, and was never finished.”

“Almost correct,” Acxa said, “After we were forced to abandon our base, Lotor had me send in sentries from our hidden base to collect all we’d left behind, and take it to the hidden base.” 

Ezor was the one who clutched her head this time, “You’re telling me Lotor had another somehow MORE secret-secret base?”

Acxa nodded. “I only knew about it after Narti’s death, when Lotor told me in the short time between that and when I, you know, shot him.” She took a deep sigh, “Before that, only Narti and Lotor knew, and the sentries he kept there, of course.”

“Well, he might not have needed to tell you at all if he hadn’t killed his only confidant,” Zethrid sneered. 

“He didn’t want to,” Lance couldn’t help spatting back.

“Lance,” Hunk took his shoulder and pulled him back, “Not the time.”

“Just because he acted quickly doesn’t mean he wanted to,” Lance said, “He hated it. He hated having to do that, you have no idea--”

“And just because he’s been boning you doesn’t mean you have any say in this,” Zethrid said, standing to her full height. Lance stared right back. “And I don’t appreciate my life being at the judgement of Lotor’s whims.”

“Your life has been at the judgement of Lotor’s whims from the day you met him,” Acxa said, coldly. “So was mine, so was Ezor's, so was 90% of anyone Lotor’s ever met, and if you don’t know that, you haven’t been paying attention.” She looked out the window as Allura directed them through the wormhole. “That’s it.”

The group looked out on the asteroid field. “The Ajanod system?” Coran asked in amazement, “THIS is where Lotor decided to set up his secret-secret base?”

“I’ve never heard of it,” Pidge said, “It hasn’t come up in ANY Galra chatter.”

“I would think it wouldn’t,” Allura said, “It was a sacred place for ancient Alteans. Something in the area disrupts all signals from getting in or out. None of our scientists were ever able to figure out why.”

“The perfect hiding place,” Acxa said, “Lotor stole the idea from your father, Princess.” Allura looked at her in shock. “He hid Lotor there for thousands of years until Haggar found him.”

“This is where Lotor was frozen?” Lance asked, looking at the dead and desolate rocks. 

Acxa nodded. “None of your lions will make it through the field,” she said, “Ezor, Zethrid, Lance and Allura should all come with me in our ships. We can maybe fit two more.”

 

They decided on Pidge and Keith, Keith as Black Paladin, and Pidge to look over any systems. “Lotor’s told you what he wants, right?” Acxa said to Lance as they made their way down.

Lance nodded. “To kill Haggar and Zarkon, and take his place as Emperor.” Lance was still a bit uneasy about that plan.

Acxa smiled, “Not such an easy goal, as I’m sure you’ve come to realize. Bring Zarkon to the point of death, and he miraculously comes right back.” Lance waited for her to get to her point. “Lotor knew this, long ago, so he sat back, and tried to think of it as smart as he could. He determined that if he could drain all of their quintessence, and hold it long enough for their bodies to die, then they would finally be gone for good.

Allura clicked her tongue, “Like he did for me, when he drained my quintessence so that I would die for a short time, breaking Haggar’s link to me.” Acxa nodded. “But that’s….that’s druid magic. Lotor’s said over and over he can’t defeat Haggar in a battle of magic. It would take years to even learn.”

“Centuries,” Acxa confirmed, “And Lotor is not a patient man. So, he thought of a way around that.” Acxa and Zethrid landed the two Sincline ships on one of the larger asteroids, “If you’ll follow me, please,” She said, guiding them along the comet’s surface. 

She put her hand on an outcropping of rock, and in moments, the rock moved aside, revealing a long metal tube. Acxa jumped in, leaving the others to stand and wonder if they were falling right into a trap. Impatiently, Lance followed her in, not waiting to see if anyone else followed. 

At the base of the tube was a cavern that Acxa stood in, helmet off. The cavern was seemingly bare, with a door on the other end, except for an odd array of items. The first and most noticable was the cat that Acxa leaned down to pet fondly, as it arched into her touch. Lance remembered it as the cat that followed Narti. 

Next was an Altean cryopod, like the ones on the castle, but this one had clearly not been used in many years, and had fallen into disrepair. The way it was shaped, it looked like a child might fit inside. Lance deduced it must have been what Lotor stayed in. It was odd to think of Lotor as a child...small, innocent...those weren’t words he associated with his boyfriend.

The third and most striking was a crystal dome, shining and reflecting a rainbow of colors from the lamps above, glittering the walls of the dank cavern. “That’s an Altean gravestone…” Allura said in awe. Lance hadn’t even notice she’d come down, along with Ezor and Keith.

Acxa looked sad at the dome. “Narti’s people sold her to the Galra...and the Galra experimented on her. Lotor decided to take her into his own lineage’s traditions.”

“That doesn’t make up for what he did,” Ezor sneered. 

Acxa bit her tongue. “No.” She said, “It doesn’t.” Zethrid and Pidge fell down the tube as well, and Acxa turned to the door. “This way.”

She lead them directly into a factory, where sentries stood on guard. “Whoa,” Pidge said looking up, “It’s bigger.”

They all looked at the ship in front of them, clearly made of the same comet and with a similar design as the first two Sincline ships, but larger. “So, he finished it,” Zethrid said. 

“Yes,” Acxa said, “and at the moment, it’s just 3 decently powerful ships, probably on par or better than one of your precious lions,” she said to the paladins.

“What does this have to do with the druid thing you were talking about?” Keith asked.

Acxa lead them over to a nearby control panel. Pressing it, she brought up specs of all 3 Sincline ships. “Lotor once told me he was always inspired by stories of Voltron as a child. He had a fascination with it, read every book that’s ever been written on the subject. And so, when the time came…” She pressed a button, and the ships twirled and changed. In a stunning formation, they merged together, stacking one on top of the other. The wings of the ships spread to create limbs, while the largest ship curled out to create a head and body, all together creating a shape...not unlike a person. A person with a druid facemask.

“Hooooly shit,” Pidge said, walking up to look at the specs, “It’s like...like a mini/scary-voltron.”

“That was the intended effect,” Acxa said, “But more than that, it was designed to be a machine, something that would amplify Lotor’s powers enough to drain Haggar and Zarkon, no need for extra learning.”

The watching crowd’s eyebrows all went into their hairlines. “If Haggar, or any of the druids, ever got control of this,” Keith said, automatically jumping to the worst possible conclusion, “They would be unstoppable.”

“Hence the need for such secrecy,” Acxa said, “Hence killing his most trusted confidante when she became a risk to that secrecy.” Acxa stared down Ezor and Zethrid, who both appeared...conflicted.

“If Lotor had this machine for killing Zarkon and Haggar,” Pidge said, “Why didn’t he use it? Like, I don’t know, when Lance was slowly dying via Haggar’s hand.”

“Oh, sure,” Acxa said sarcastically, “Just kill the one person who could heal him, that makes sense.”

“Still,” Allura said, “Why not use it as soon as the third ship was built?” 

“Well….that part he should have told you,” Acxa said, “Because that’s where you step in.”

Allura’s frown deepened. “Excuse me?”

Acxa zoomed in on the projection of Sincline. “The machine requires a tremendous amount of quintessence. A….honestly a ludicrous amount of quintessence to properly work and power it.”

“The infinite quintessence,” Ezor said, elements clicking in her brain, “That’s what he wanted it for.” Acxa nodded, “But...that didn’t work.”

“No,” Acxa said, “And that’s why he came to Voltron.”

Lance shook his head, “He came to us for protection.”

Acxa actually rolled her eyes. “He may not be trusting, but Lotor has allies in every corner of the universe, entire planets he’s conquered, he hardly needed to go to a people that hated him for protection. But he did need Allura.”

Allura blinked. “Me?”

“Or at the least,” Acxa continued, “A high Altean who can manage to drain energy from the rift, as Lotor was unable to do. Lotor’s job was to get you to agree to power it.”

Allura scoffed, “Well, he didn’t do too well,” She said, “If he was trying to get me to like him he did everything he could to stop me.”

“Well, admittedly,” Acxa’s eyes slid to Lance, “Some of his plan went….awry.” She sighed. “He’s a brilliant tactician really, but sometimes he fails to account for variables. Most often that variable is himself. Still, somehow he usually makes things work out.” 

“Well I’m not doing it!” Allura said, “You want me to power a machine capable of untold levels of destruction? That only someone with druid magic can use? You must be out of your--”

“Allura,” Lance interrupted, tasting the first bit of hope since he’d been shot by Haggar’s lightning, “Allura please….It’s the only way to save him….”

“Are we sure we want to?” Pidge asked, turning away from the ship specs. Lance opened his mouth, “Before you fight me, hear me out. I know I didn’t like Lotor in the beginning, but he won me over, okay? I’m not saying we’re better off without him but…this is really risky, like….like REALLY risky. And, honestly, and I hate saying this...we have no reason to believe Lotor’s not already...you know…” Lance flinched. “I’m sorry.” She said, looking at her feet. 

“The kid’s right,” Ezor said, “If he’s been with Haggar this long, we have no reason to expect he’s still alive.”

“If he is, we’re all doomed,” Acxa said, “Unless any of you have some other means of destroying the most powerful dictator in the universe’s history.” 

They all exchanged looks. “I think we should do it,” Keith said, out of the blue. “I mean, it’s your call, Allura, but. I vote yes.”

“I do too,” Zethrid said. 

Ezor turned to her shocked, “What? How can you say--”

“I still got a punch ready with Lotor’s name on it,” Zethrid said, “But if we have a chance to fight Zarkon and win, I’d rather take it.”

Allura took a deep sigh. “Looks like I’m outvoted,” She turned to Acxa. “Fine. Let’s go on the terrible, terrible, suicidal plan to save….Lotor.” 

 

They flew all three ships out of the asteroid field, and loaded them into the castle, explaining their plan to the remainder of their team. “You holding up okay?” Hunk said, putting his arm around Lance’s shoulders. 

Lance took a deep breath. “I don’t know…” he said, “I just...do you think” He swallowed, “you think Lotor…” He couldn't get the word out, “Do you think he’s…”

“Lotor’s a survivor,” Hunk said, “If anyone can make it, he can.”

Lance nodded, “Right…” he hugged his arms to himself, “Right…”

“Uh, guys?” Pidge said from her control seat, “We have a problem.”

She brought up Daibazaal up on the screen, “That’s the rift we need to drain the quintessence from,” She zoomed in, closer on the hold in the planet, “And that….is Haggar’s ship.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear to god I'll make up for the endless plot of this eventually but....I did say I'd be making a bunch of shit up. So. Have a bunch of made up shit.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance and team Voltron get to see what happened after Lance left Lotor with Haggar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry didn't get this to you yesterday, I finally went to the store and picked up a life. So....considering I don't know how long this might be, it might be slower.

Allura stood up as tall as he could, gripping the control pillars with her full strength. “Are they coming to intercept us?”

“No,” Pidge said, “She’s just….sitting there. I don’t know if she’s noticed us, she’s at the edge of our sensors.”

“What’s she doing out here at all?” Keith asked, “Could she have found what we’re going to do already? Could she have heard us through Shiro somehow, or--”

“Or, she has the one person on board who made the plans to begin with,” Matt interrupted, “If Lotor’s given us up--”

“He wouldn’t.” Acxa said, “He’d die first.”

“I’m saying he might not have had a choice,” Matt said. “This is a powerful space witch, right? Maybe she has mind reading or something.”

“She doesn’t have mind reading,” Zethrid said, rolling her eyes. Then she looked to Acxa. “Does she?” Acxa shook her head. 

Matt shuffled slightly. “There are other ways of getting information from someone.”

Lance flinched as he realized what Matt was talking about. Hunk squeezed him tight, as his mouth went dry. He turned his head, burying it in Hunk’s chest. 

“Lotor’s been tortured before,” Acxa said, “He hasn’t given anything up, not once.” Remarkably, her words didn’t make Lance feel better.

“Yeah, but again,” Matt said, “This is Haggar so--”

“Stop,” Lance said, unable to hear another word. “Just...speculating is getting us nowhere.”

“Pidge,” Keith said, “Any way we can get a look at what’s happening in there?”

Pidge sighed, “Most Galra ships have cameras to tap into, but I’ll need a direct link.”

Keith nodded, “Okay. We’ll take one of the lions in under cloak, attach whatever you need.”

“I’ll go,” Lance said.

Hunk froze around him. “Lance, I don’t think that’s--”

“Red’s fastest,” he said, “I’ll be in and out quicker than anyone else can make it in.”

“Making it in isn’t the problem,” Allura said, “It’s getting out we’re all worried about, specifically leaving when...you know who’s on board.”

Lance swallowed. “I know what the best way to get him back is,” he said, “I’m still a paladin. I know how to do my job.”

Keith nodded, his face stoic. Lance had been so busy he only just noticed….he’d changed into his paladin armor. “We’ll be on standby in case you need back up.” Lance nodded. “In and out.”

 

Allura was right. Getting in was easy. Lance felt a pull like a magnet. Separate from everyone else, his lion was full of unending silence. All he could think of was his and Lotor’s first date, driving Lotor to the mermaid planet, getting not-so-subtly seduced. He went over every single interaction he’d had with Lotor, from the day Lotor spilled soup on his lap all the way down to the day when he watched Lotor get surrounded by images of Haggar as Shiro dragged him to safety. 

The lion was so, so quiet.

He landed the lion on Haggar’s ship. He was reminded of what Matt said, of what might be happening right now to Lotor right beneath his feet. If he was alive at all. Images floated through his head of Red ripping through the hull of the ship, grabbing Lotor in his lion’s mouth and flying them to safety. 

Suddenly he couldn’t think of any reason he couldn’t do that, couldn’t think of any reason why he couldn’t save Lotor the same way Lotor saved him. Sure, it was a suicide mission, but that’s what it was when Lotor took him to Haggar. Lotor gave up everything to save him, his plan that he’d been working on since quiznak-knew-how-long just to save him. Just because he loved him. 

If Lance loved Lotor as much, shouldn’t he try and save Lotor, screw the consequences?

He took a deep sigh. For a moment he tried to remind himself exactly of what he’d told Allura and Keith, but that just made him depressed, so instead decided not to think. He attached the upload link to the hull where Pidge had told him to, and detached himself. “I’ll come back,” He whispered to the ship. “I’m going to come back.” 

He reached under his mask and wiped the tear from his face as he piloted back to the castle. 

 

“Alright, here we go,” Pidge said, “Watch closely, Dad, this is where I shine.”

“I had no doubts,” Sam said, smiling proudly at his daughter. 

Pidge couldn’t hide her happiness as she typed vigorously on her control panel. Quickly, images from within the ship all started appearing on the main screen, mostly hallways filled with stoic sentries, and cold, empty rooms. “Check the laboratory,” Lance said, his voice as steady as he could make it. 

Hunk had resumed his position, draping himself over Lance’s back and trying to provide support. Lance didn’t lean into it anymore, standing tall and chewing on a hangnail on his thumb. 

As directed, Pidge brought up an image of the laboratory, which Lance recognized instantly. What was harder to recognize was what exactly was happening. Haggar stood over a table and a canister of yellow liquid, passing her hands over it. 

Then, Lotor came up. First, Lance breathed a sigh of relief just that he was alive. Then, he noticed gratefully that he seemed okay, not injured, not suffering in any way, or showing any signs he had been suffering. In fact...he looked better than he had when Lance had left him, more refreshed and energized since his days of not sleeping and caring for Lance. And...he was relaxed. Smiling. At Haggar. 

Lance squinted, trying to make sure what he was seeing what he thought he was seeing. 

Lotor brought Haggar another canister of liquid. She put a hand over his, almost...fondly. “Well….” Allura said, “I don’t...it seems like he’s helping her.”

“No,” Lance snapped, “He hates her, he would never.”

“Pidge,” Keith said, “Can we get audio?”

She nodded and pressed a few buttons. Lotors voice came through “—does this work? I mean I tried opening up the rift before it didn’t work.”

“Alchemy is a...temperamental science. You’ve learned only the simplest and most basic elements of one part of that science.” Haggar said. Then, she shocked the watching audience, by reaching up and fondly patting Lotors cheek. “Don’t worry. You’ll have all the time in the universe to learn more than you could ever dream.”

If that shocked them, it was nothing compared to how they felt when Lotor took her hand in his and smiled at her. “More than I could ever hope to dream. Thank you, mother.”

“Mother?!” At least 5 of the watching audience shouted.

“Well, so much for our rescue plan…” Matt said.

“This can’t be right,” Lance said, “she’s...she’s mind-controlled him or—or something!”

“Maybe…” Keith said, frowning, “Pidge, can you rewind the tape? So we can see what happened since Lance left?”

“Well, I mean it’s not a tape, it’s more of—“ Pidge cut herself off at the sight of Keith’s glare. “Yeah, yeah I can do that.”

With the press of a button the video moved scrolling faster than Lance could make sense of the images. “And there’s Lance…” Pidge said, slowing down the tape to see Lance being dragged away by Shiro. She sped the tape up in reverse, though slow enough they could make out the motions, “aaand fighting, fighting, fighting,” she said as Lotor slashed and struck at images of Haggar over and over. It looked comical sped up in the way it was. “Wait, here we go.”

The video went to normal speed, showing Haggar standing at the end of Lotor’s sword, and Lotor looking shocked.

 

“Mother?” Lotor said, his face screwed up in horror. “No, my—my mother was Honerva. Altean alchemist, Queen of Daibazaal, and—“

“Honerva…” She said almost to herself, “I haven’t gone by the name Honerva in over 10,000 years,” she looked at her own hands in confusion, “I don’t know if I am Honerva anymore. So much of her has been lost...but I was her. This body, this mind, this very quintessence...it was all her.”

Lotor shook his head backing away from her, his sword shaking in his hand. “This is a lie,” he said, “this...honestly, witch, I’m disappointed. You’re tricks have never been so blatantly false.” His words were calm, but he was still shaking. 

She sighed. “I could show you blood tests to prove it,” she said, pacing away from him, to look down at the table she’d healed Lance on. “Maybe I could show you something that belonged to Honerva, something I’d managed to keep through the eons.” She smiled at the table, “you were born on a table just like this one,” she said. “I remember now...you were so small, smaller than I expected. It was a process just to combine Galran and Altean dna, But...you’re father wanted to have you so badly.”

Lotor watched her carefully. He tried to respond, but wasn’t sure what to say. It was far too ridiculous, too absurd to be true. And yet he couldn’t understand why she would tell such an obvious lie?

“Do you remember…”Haggar started, “the way you would sneak into my lab as I was working?” She laughed at the memory. “you looked so different than the galran children...I think you craved just seeing an Altean, someone like you.”

Lotor didn’t remember, not specifically. There were no images brought to mind, just...feelings. Feelings of loneliness of...of desire to see his mother once again...of sadness, of a memory of a memory. Finally, things were clicking lightly into place.

“You were dead,” the words came out of him at nearly a whisper, “I saw you. You died.”

“Yes,” Haggar said, not denying it, “but just as your father was brought back, incomplete but powerful, I survived as something new.”

He shook his head. “It’s not possible.”

“You know it is,” she said, “you know the truth.”

“What do you want from me?” His anger coming through again. 

“I want,” she said, her own warmth melting to make way for her typical harsh manner, “everything that was taken from me. My memories. My work. My family.”

Lotor swallowed. “Well, as wonderful as that sounds, a reunion may be tricky at the moment.” He sneered at her, “if you remember, my father, your husband, wants me dead. I don’t think your new memories will change his mind.”

She nodded, “You will change his mind. Once you pledge allegiance to him once again.”

He squinted at her, suspiciously, “and why would I do that? And even if I did, how would you stop him from killing me on sight.”

“Because I will give you the gift that your father once gave me,” she said, “though while he gave it recklessly, carelessly, I will be thoughtful and cautious.” He stayed silent, waiting for her to reveal her ‘gift.’ “My son...I will give you the gift of immortality.”

 

Everyone froze at the mention of Haggars gift. “Well…” Matt said… “fuck.”

“I knew it!” Ezor said. They all turned to her. “Well, I mean, I didn’t know THAT. But I knew Lotor wasn’t to be trusted!”

“No,” Lance said, shaking his head, “no way, he—he must be playing her, or-or something.”

“Are you sure?” Hunk said, “even with the offer of IMMORTALITY? Even when given the chance to be accepted with his family again?”

“Acxa,” Keith said, “you’ve known him longest. Is this enough to turn him?” 

Acxa looked uncomfortable, “I…” She started, her voice failing her, “I’m not sure.”

“I don’t believe it.” Lance said, crossing his arms and standing tall. “Even...even if that was something he wanted, he wouldn’t go back to Zarkon. He may not be the most compassionate person, but he knows what Zarkon does is wrong. And he blames Haggar for Narti’s death, AND his terrible life with the druids! Her being his mother changes nothing. He has no loyalty to his father, why should he to his mother?”

“It’s different, though, isn’t it?” Allura said, “his father vs. his mother. He doesn’t even know his mother. You said yourself he’s lost a lot. Do you think...that given the opportunity for a family again—“

“He has a family!” Lance shouted at her, tears welling up in his eyes, “I’M his family! I love him, I TRUST him, and I know he won’t betray us. He won’t betray me.”

The others all looked at each other awkwardly. “Either way,” Coran said, trying to break the tension, “the last time this experiment was done, it caused the destruction of Daibazaal. A repeat may have consequences throughout the sector, out to some heavily colonized planets.”

“Not to mention,” Ezor said, “if lover boy is wrong, that’s a THIRD immortal terrifying being in the universe to worry about.”

“We have to stop them,” Keith agreed, “Pidge, download a map of the schematics for the ship, we’ll work on coming up with a plan to infiltrate and stop their plans. Her plans,” he corrected when Lance opened his mouth. “Lance, you should monitor the video feed, make sure nothing else happens, and if Lotor is just playing along, try to pick up any clues we might be able to use to help him.”

Lance hesitated, wanting to argue. He knew Keith was only asking to keep Lance out of the planning meeting, in case they needed to do something to Lotor. Still, he silently nodded, knowing if they tried, he’d stop them anyway.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance thinks Lotor has come up with a plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the problem with writing "and then they make a plan" in your outline fails when you have to actually MAKE THE PLAN

Lance transferred the video file over to a laptop for him to take to his room, watching as Lotor and Haggar worked in relative silence. Every once in a while Lotor would ask a question about Haggar was doing, how it worked, etc. Lance didn’t pretend to understand it. 

Mostly he just watched Lotor’s face. He really needed to take his boyfriend to Vegas when they got to Earth. His poker face was too good. It looked to someone who didn’t know him as well that Lotor was in awe of Haggar, and happy, maybe with a touch of relief at having found her. But Lance knew him and had saw him when he was really in awe and happy and relieved and it didn’t look like that. Much. 

He played in his head the idea that he was wrong, that Lotor really had turned dark side It was always a possibility since Lotor had come on board a year ago. It was something he watched Lotor for. But Lotor earned his trust. His love. Would he really throw it away now? For his mother?

Lance thought about what he’d do if he was in Lotor’s place, if Haggar turned out to be his mother. But, he loved his mother, his mother had known him his whole life. It was different. It--god this whole situation was fucked. He stared down at Haggar and silently cursed her, cursed her for manipulating Lotor in this way. Worse, she had used him to do it. 

He just wanted everything to go back to normal. 

“And what about memories?” Lotor asked on the screen, “you lost yours, I’d hate for that to happen to me.” 

“I’m making modifications to attempt to get rid of any after effects,” Haggar responded, “but if you’re worried, we can download the memories beforehand, to reupload afterwards.”

Lotors mask slipped and he looked hesitant. “What is it, my son?” She said, “do you not trust me?”

His mouth twitched. “No, it’s just…well, mother or not, you and I haven’t had the best track record in trust. It can be hard to get used to.”

She nodded. “I can understand. But I AM your mother. Those incidents are in the past now.”

Lance could see the thoughts churning in Lotor’s mind. “There are also some things in those memories that…to be blunt, a Mother probably shouldn’t see.”

“You mean your trysts with the Voltron Paladin,” Haggar said, “Yes, I’ve been hearing all about that.”

“With your spy,” Lotor said.

Haggar’s mouth twitched into a smile. “Yes. That was quite the confession you gave on Paquador.”

Lance felt violated, knowing the witch had been watching with Shiro’s eyes at one of their most romantic moments. Lotor himself looked a bit uncomfortable. “I was using him to get favor from the Altean Princess,” He said, unknowingly stabbing Lance in his heart. “It wasn’t…I only mean that it was practical, so—“

“There’s no reason to feel ashamed, son,” She said continually passing her hands over the canister of quintessence, the contents swirling beneath her. “You’re a lot like your father, and that includes your ability to love.”

Lotor’s brow creased in confusion. “Zarkon isn’t someone I really associate with ‘love.’”

“No, not anymore,” She said, “We will show him it’s value again.”

He bit his lip, considering what to say. “You’re not someone I would have associated either.”

“Before you knew I was your mother, you mean.” She said.

He grinned, “Of course.”

She chuckled, and it still sounded so evil to Lance. “Love is powerful. Did you think only Voltron thought so?” He didn’t seem to know how to respond to that. “Your love for…what was his name…Lance,” A chill ran down Lance’s spine at the sound of his own name, “is what brought you to me.”

Lotor’s face darkened for just a moment. “You tried to kill him.”

“Only because I knew you’d save him,” Haggar said, “And you did. Perhaps, if this works, one day you can bring him through this process. You and he can live out the rest of the universe together.”

Lance’s blood turned cold at the thought. It was one thing for Lotor to go through with this, but Lance? Immortal? He couldn’t process it, he—it didn’t register, it was like imagining if he grew a second head.

“He would be reluctant,” Lotor said, “He has a great love for Voltron, and for his friends.”

“Do not underestimate his great love for you,” Haggar said, “If he loves you, he will do it for you.”

For a moment, a brief moment, Lotor’s eyes flickered up to the camera. Lance wondered…could he—could he know about the spy device? “Perhaps,” Was all he said.

If he knew about the device and didn’t tell Haggar, or try to turn it off, he MUST be lying to her, just as Lance suspected. And if that was true, he also knew Voltron was nearby, possibly planning a rescue for him.

“Lance?” There was a knock on his door, which opened to reveal Allura. “We have a tentative plan. Pidge needs to add in some modifications, but it could work, if you want to come up and hear it. I can monitor for a while.”

“Hold on a minute,” Lance said, watching the screen intently. If he knew Lotor, Lotor would have a plan, and he’d try and leave clues.

“Perhaps with his help, we’ll be able to turn all the paladins,” Lotor said, “It would be useful to have Voltron on our side.”

Allura stood over his shoulder. “Not much chance of that,” She said.

“We can get new paladins for Voltron,” Haggar said, sounding far more like her usual witch-y self, “The paladins will be captured and put to death, along with any of their allies.”

“Charming woman,” Allura said, “What are you looking for?”

“Wait…” Lance said. Lotor’s eyes flickered to the camera once again, “There! Did you see that?”

“See what?” Allura asked, “Of course he knows there’s a camera there, she just doesn’t know we’re watching.”

“I think he does,” Lance said.

“ALL of the paladins?” Lotor said.

“Don’t tell me you’re in love with ALL of them,” Haggar asked.

Lotor actually laughed. “Hardly, hardly. But…it does seem like such a waste. Several of them can probably be put to good use.” Lotor’s eyes flickered to the camera again, “Allura, for instance. It’d be a shame to simply destroy one of the few Altean’s left. Why, with only a little help, she could be nearly as powerful a druid as myself. She’s already practiced with some Altean Alchemy.”

Allura frowned. “Well isn’t that….nice?” She asked, sounding just a little overly sarcastic.

“I think…” Lance said, “I think I know what he’s planning.”

“Planning?” Allura said, “What do you—“

“You’re going to take his place,” Lance said.

Allura blinked at him. “Take his…what do you mean?”

“The Sincline,” Lance said, “It’s designed to enhance druid energy. I think he’s saying it can also enhance YOUR magical abilities. You should be able to use it against Haggar.”

“What?!” Allura said “That’s…Lance I hate to say it, but it sounds like you’re reaching.”

Lance deflated. “Reaching?”

“Guessing,” she corrected, “Based on information you BELIEVE or WANT to be there, but might not—“

“It is there,” Lance snapped, “And if it’s not…even if it’s just my own projections and not Lotor’s plan, it’s still a good plan, and I’m taking it to Keith.”

Allura took a deep breath. “But Lance…the kind of magic you’re talking about…I don’t know how to do it. Lotor said so himself.”

Lance shoved the laptop into her hands, “Keep watching. Lotor’s been asking magic questions all day, try and learn something.”

Without giving her a chance to argue, he got up and ran out to search for Keith.

 

“It’s a bad plan,” Ezor said.

“Terrible,” Pidge agreed.

“Like a really, really, really bad plan,” Ezor further emphasized.

“Oh, and your guys’ plan was so much better?” Lance asked.

“It was flawed, admittedly,” Hunk said, “But, Lance—“

“If I’m wrong,” Lance interrupted, “We use the Sincline on both Lotor AND Haggar. If we kill them and destroy the machine, that should take care of the problem, right?”

Keith’s face was scrunched up as it usually was when trying to make a hard decision. He was better at this than he thought, but the self doubt hindered him some. “What do you think?” He asked Acxa.

Acxa looked equally contemplative, but less frustrated. “It’s possible. But with less energy coming from Allura herself, we’re going to need a LOT of charge for it. And it won’t hold for long. But it might be long enough.”

Keith sighed, thinking. “What if we put a few safeguards in place,” Sam suggested, “Come up with solutions to problems that may come up.”

“Safeguards like what?” Pidge asked.

Sam shook his head, “I was hoping to prompt an idea with the suggestion.”

“Allura,” Keith called into the comms, “Can you come up here, please?”

Allura came up, carrying the laptop where Lotor was still chattering away to Haggar. Ignoring the sound of it, Keith explained Lance’s plan to her. “Lance thinks if we distract Haggar with Voltron, you and the generals will be able to get to the rift under cloak, charge the Sincline, and use it. Can you do it?”

She sighed, “The first part…probably, if given time. The second part…maybe.”

“’Maybe’, ‘Probably,’” Matt quoted, “It’s not exactly reassuring. Not to mention Lotor has gotten past Pidge and my technology before. He might be able to again.”

“If it helps,” Allura said, “I think…I think it’s worth it.”

Lance resisted the urge to tackle-hug her. “You do?”

“You do?” Pidge said, with a completely different tone.

Allura nodded, “I’ve been watching the tapes and…I could be wrong, but I’ve learned some about Lotor too in these months. I think he’s stalling.”

“How can you be sure?” Keith said.

“I’m not,” Allura said, “But the way he talks to her…it’s the same way he talks to me, asking innocent questions to things he already knows, in the guise of simple ignorance…And I KNOW he manipulates me, so…” She turned to Lance, “Besides, we saw how hard he fought for Lance, and that’s something that can’t be faked. I don’t have to like him. But…I do trust him.”

Lance beamed at her. Some of the others looked hesitant, but Keith was slowly nodding. “Alright, then. While Lotor stalls for us, let’s talk logistics.”

 

When they’d come up with enough safeguards to decently satisfy people, they brought Shiro up. “Guys, what are you doing” Shiro asked as he came on deck, “Haggar could take control of me any time!”

“We know,” Keith said, looking sympathetic, “But we need you to pilot the black lion.”

Shiro looked at him like he’d just suggested skinny dipping in the vacuum of space. “Are you crazy? That’s the worst place I should be! And where’s Allura?”

“We have a plan,” Lance said, “You’ll have to understand we can’t tell you what it is.”

Shiro looked hurt, but nodded. “Alright,” Keith said, “Everyone to you’re lions, and lets form Voltron as fast as we can.

“This is a bad idea,” Shiro mumbled, heading to Black’s chute.

“You’re telling me,” Matt said.

Steeling himself, Lance went to the blue lion tube. It was actually strange going this way, when it felt like he had just gotten used to Red. “Hey, girl,” He said, landing in the Blue lion’s cockpit. He felt a purr of approval. “Yeah, I missed you too.”

As planned, they formed Voltron. With Shiro so wary, the connection wasn’t as strong as usual, but it felt vaguely familiar, like the first time they’d managed to form Voltron. “Okey dokey, kids,” Matt’s voice came over the intercom, “I’ve set up this link to exclude Shiro, so, tune into ESWR, aka Evil Space Witch Radio,”

Lance rolled his eyes. He listened to a crackling as the spy link was patched into their projections. “Mother,” Lotor’s voice came through, “There’s a ship incoming on an intercept course. It’s…It’s Voltron!” He sounded so surprised. Definitely taking him to Vegas.

There were frustrated noises from Haggar. “She’s bringing up the Shiro vision,” Matt said, describing what they couldn’t see.

“Even the paladins are not so foolish,” Haggar said, “They know I can just take him. Sweep the area! Look for anything they’re trying to hide.”

The moment of truth, Lance thought, waiting for Lotor’s reply. “No sign of anything on sensors.”

Lance breathed a sigh of relief. “Hmm…” Haggar said, very well then.”

“Wait!” Lotor said, making Lance freeze, “there is something...heading towards the rift. Three more ships.”

Lance frowned. Lotor was...he gave up the sin line ships. Their distraction. Everything. How could he do that? Betray them?

“Fire on those vessels!” Haggar yelled, and a shot flew off towards the cloaked Sincline ships. 

The ships materialized, halfway to the rift, and directly in the path of Haggars weapons.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which both Lotor and this author have overly complex plans that sometimes don't work out

“Separate!” Keith called over comms, “Spread out and defend the Sincline. Focus on her weapon systems!” 

“Um, guys,” Shiro said, “She’s trying to access Black’s weapons.” He didn’t mention she was trying to get to them through him. 

“It’s alright,” Pidge said, as the lions separated, flanking Haggar’s ship, “I installed lock-outs on Black’s controls, she should be returning to the ship on auto-pilot.”

“Thank you,” Shiro said, almost meekly.

“A little help, please!” Allura shouted over the comms as the 3 ships spiralled away from the blasts.

“This is so weird,” Matt said, “I’m spying on her, spying on you--oh--Oh shoot I said that in the chat with Shiro didn’t I?”

“The videos gone?” Pidge demanded.

“It doesn’t matter, we know where she is and what she’s doing,” Keith said, rolling to avoid a shot from the ship, “It’s just one Galra ship, we can take her easy.”

“Lotor’s on that thing,” Hunk protested, “If we destroy it, we could hurt him.”

“Oh, don’t you worry about that,” Lance grimaced through his teeth, “I’ll take care of him myself.”

“Lance,” Keith shouted, “Stay in formation!”

“I don’t fucking think so!” Lance yelled, directing Blue’s head directly at Haggar’s ship.“Hey Shiro,” Lance turned on his comm with him, “if Haggar’s watching, tell her that her immortality better really be up to par.”

“Lance!” Everyone shouted at varied volumes and tones.

It was too late. Lance rammed his lion into the Galra ships docking bay, breaking through the hull of the vessel.

Blue screeched to a halt on the docking bay floor, sparks flying. Immediately she came under fire from sentries stationed there. Lance shot several with lasers, swiped more away with Blue's claws, but there simply wasn’t enough room for his lion to maneuver. He dropped the ramp and jumped from her mouth, Bayard out and already firing.

Sentries swarmed him instantly. He fought one handed, firing with one and using his shield with the other. Soon the sentries got too close and he switched to his sword, slashing left and right through their defenses. He ran on a blurred cocktail of anger, adrenaline, and instinct. 

In moments, though, the fog over his brain settled slightly, and he realized he MIGHT have bit off something bigger than he could chew. The sentries just kept COMING and he was making little progression through the room. 

Quickly, he focused his efforts on dodging and evading, slipping past the sentries until he reached the door on the far side. He barrel rolled through, a laser shot skimming a little close to his hair for his comfort.

As soon as he was through, he slashed at the control panels, and the door slammed shut, trapping the sentries on the other side. 

Well, the old sentries, anyway. As he looked up, he noticed an army of sentries, marching forward in perfect synchronization, 4 across, and who knew how many sentries deep, a solid wall blocking the hallway beyond.

And at the very front of it stood Lotor, sword in hand, looking confused down at Lance.

Lance jumped to his feet, raising his sword at him. Lotor held his hand up, getting the sentries to stop. They stood across one another, considering, sizing each other up. Lotor squinted at him. “Are you here to kill me, kit?”

Truthfully, Lance didn’t know how to answer that. He wasn’t sure if there was one. Screaming, he swung his sword wide at Lotor, a blow Lotor easily deflected, taking a step back. In unison, all the sentries stepped back as well, giving their master room.

“What happens now, my prince?” He snarled the former endearment, “is this the part where you ask me to join you?” He slashed again, forcing Lotor to deflect and step back, the sentries stepping back as well. “Rule the universe by your side?” Another slash, another deflection, another step back. “Offer me immortality?” Slash, deflect step. “Tell me...tell me that you love me? And say—“ two slashes this time. The hot angry tears he’d been holding back since Lotor fires on the Sincline sprung forth, “say that if I loved you I’d do this for you?”

“Yes,” Lotor said, catching the sword this time instead of just deflecting it away, “yes, this is the part where I tell you all of that.” He smiled, fondly instead of malevolently, “and this is the part where you tell me you’re loyal to Voltron, and I was supposed to be too.” Lance tried to pull his sword free, pushing into Lotor, but he only backed up again, pulling Lance with him. “You tell me you love me, how could I betray you?”

“HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME?!” He demanded, freeing his sword, “I BELIEVED you, I TRUSTED you, I...I lo—“ he couldn’t get the word out. Mostly because he couldn’t figure out if it was supposed to be in past or present test.

“You love me,” Lotor said, so self-sure it only made Lance angrier, “and I love you. We’re in love.” He took another step back.

“That can change, buddy,” Lance spat, charging on him.

Lotors mouth twitched up. “If you did this for me, it would prove that you loved me.” He stepped back again, the sentries half a hall down from where they’d started, “but you wouldn’t be you anymore. And if you weren’t you...I couldn’t love you.”

Lotor’s smile widened like he had just revealed a crucial detail. Lance squinted at him, too pumped up on adrenaline to try and understand his clever turns of phrase. “What?”

Lotor sighed. Then, he lunged forward, quicker than Lance had ever seen, moving past Lance’s sword and tackling him against the wall. At the same time he pressed a button and grabbed a handle. The hatch Lotor had positioned them in front of opened, sucking out all the air in the room, and the army of sentries with it. 

On instinct, Lance clutched onto Lotor, closing his mask so he could still breath. Lotors hair whipped as the air released around them. Lotor closed the hatch again, leaving them in silence except for their combined breath and pounding heartbeats. 

“Well,” Lotor said, “that worked we-“ Lance slapped him across the face. “Did you just—you SLAPPED me!”

“It was a plot?!” Lance yelled at him, slapping him again, “You—you broke my damn heart for a SCHEME?!”

“Well, would you have preferred it to be real?” Lotor asked. Lance tried to slap him a third time but Lotor grabbed his hand. “Stop. I...I’m sorry.” He took a deep breath, “things got...complicated, and I had to improvise.”

Lance took several shuddering breaths. “So you...you’re really not…”

Lotor shook his head “No. Never.”

Lance breathed, relieved, leaning his head against Lotors chest. Lotor rubbed the less-armored small of his back comfortingly. “What kind of stupid ass plan was this?”

Lotor sighed. “I’ll have you know, it was a brilliant plan. Almost flawless. You all just didn’t get my signals right.”

Lance lifted his head sharply, his anger coming back full force. “You’re blaming this on ME?!”

A shot passed over their heads, making them duck and separate. Down the hall a new batch of sentries was running toward them, firing all the way. Lotor put up his shield, covering the both of them, while Lance changed his bayard to a gun at fired at them.

“Not blaming,” Lotor said, as though they weren’t under heavy fire, “just...I was kind of expecting you to use Sincline as the distraction and Voltron to sneak Allura to the rift.”

“Why would we do that?” Lance demanded, quickly ducking out of the shield to destroy the front few sentries. They were still marching down alarmingly fast, “Allura can’t use the Sincline if she doesn’t HAVE the Sincline,”

“I wasn’t recommending she did!" Lotor said, “I just wanted her to charge it, which she could do remotely. Then you could get the Sincline to me and I could use it!”

“Okay, that REALLY could have been explained better!” Lance said, “couldn’t you have written it down or something?” 

The sentries came down on them, pounding on Lotors shield. He looked to Lance, who nodded, turning his bayard from gun to sword. In a flash, he dropped the shield and the two of them lunges in practiced formation, slashing at the opposing enemy and sending sparks around the hallway.

“Haggar can check the cameras too,” Lotor yelled over the fighting, “I didn’t even think using Sincline in secret would occur to you, given it doesn’t have cloaks!”

“We gave it cloaks!” Lance shouted back.

“Well, how was I supposed to know?!” Lotor demanded, flipping over a sentry, and burying his sword in two more.

They both spun around as the sentries moved to surround them, landing back to back. “Acxa was right about you,” Lance said, eyes flickering from sentry to sentry to determine who to fight first, “brilliant tactician, but you forget about variables.”

“So you think I’m brilliant?” Lotor said, and despite being behind him, Lance could HEAR his smirk. Lance rolled his eyes, pushing off from Lotor to lunge at a nearby enemy. 

“I still don’t see why that means giving up Sincline’s location,” Lance said.

“Because,” Lotor said, chopping off a pair of sentry heads, “If Allura’s in the Sincline, there’s no way she can both charge it AND fire it, not at her level of experience. I needed to get one of you to bring me a ship capable of going into the rift so I could charge it myself. I knew if I appeared to have given over completely, you would be rightfully angered.”

Lance had to actually pause, standing on a broken sentry to stare at Lotor, “You….pissed me off because you knew I’d come here and kick your ass?”

Lotor smirked, staring right back as he defeated the last of the oncoming sentries, “I may have missed some variables...but I know you.”

Lance sighed, and he wasn’t entirely sure if he wanted to punch him or kiss him. He ended up deciding on the latter, grabbing onto Lotors chest plate and tugging him over, still standing on a sentry to give him equal height for once. 

Lotor leaned into the kiss, putting a steadying hand on Lance’s hip. Lance separated from him, “You are so going to pay for this.”

“My sentiments exactly,” a croaky old woman’s voice echoed around them. They both searched wildly for the sources, but were much more preoccupied with the way the walls of the ship seemed to be twisting and thinning. With a snap, the ship broke, the hallway beyond them breaking off and blasting away from them. 

Lance closed his helmet again, Holding onto Lotor as he didn’t have his own and jetting them back into the ship, fighting against the air releasing into the vacuum of space. 

Finally, the shields kicked in, and the two of them landed hard on the ground, Lance pinned under Lotors weight. 

Lance smiled up at him, wanting to make a joke, but...the half of the ship that was flying away had his lion on board. “Can’t you summon it or something?” Lotor asked, getting up.

“Only when in great mortal peril,” Lance said, accepting Lotors hand to stand himself.

They looked out through the gaping hole in the ship as a shape moved into their vision. In less than a moment, Haggar came floating down, hair a messy halo in the vacuum of space. “Mortal peril seems likely,” Lotor said, standing in front of Lance and backing them away. 

Haggar’s eyes flared with anger as she floated forward, easily going through the shields and landing in the floor, “I offered you family,” Haggar said, “I offered you an immortal life. And all I asked in return was for you to be my son again!”

“If I have to be YOUR son, that price is too high,” Lotor said, with his typical sneer. 

Haggar waved her arms, and all the fallen sentries were pushed to the side as though she parted the sea. “Ungrateful brat!” She snarled, “This is why I never wanted children.”

“Well, I never wanted my parents to be malevolent dictators intent on destroying all that does not bow to them,” Lotor said, backing away from her and pushing Lance with him, “so I guess we’re both unhappy.”

“Get down!” Lance yelled, pulling on him as Haggar pointed a finger at them, lightning shooting out and hitting the wall behind them. Lance grabbed Lotor’s arm and yanked him back, running as fast as they could from Haggar. 

“Keith, come in, have you been listening?” He said to his comms.

“We got most of the story, I think,” Keith said, “Hunk’s retrieving your lion.”

“Well we’re going to need it!” Lance shouted, racing down the corridors, hand in hand with Lotor, “I’m going to try and find a hatch to get out of, the vacuum of space is better than—“

He screeched to a halt, Lotor knocking into him. Down the hall Haggar stood before them, patiently waiting. Lance grabbed Lotors hand again, pulling him in the opposite direction, down corridors and--

Haggar was there too.

Lance pulled back again. “She’s herding us,” Lotor said.

“Yeah no shit,” Lance said, “But I’d rather not be lightning-poisoned again so--”

“Lance wait--” Lotor tried to shout but it was too late. They’d already turned the corner, and a door shut behind them. 

They were locked inside Haggar’s laboratory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly the end of this chapter was decided more based on my phone's battery life than anything, but I stumbled into another cliffhanger. Sorry about this, I'm somewhat addicted to them.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Haggar tries to force things her way, and Lance has a plan too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOOAH LOOK WHO'S BACK, BABY. I JUST GOT HOME AND I WROTE THIS WHOLE CHAPTER ON THE PLANE, AND A GOOD PORTION OF NEXT CHAPTER AS WELL. AND ITS LONGER THAN SOME OF THE OTHERS.

Haggar materialized in front of them, turned away and typing on her control panel. Lances fight/flight instincts kicked in and he shot at her. The laser shots passed right through her.

 

“This can all be fixed,” Haggar said, as though she were muttering to herself, “Once you’ve experienced pure quintessence, you will understand,” with the press of a control switch, an empty cylinder tank came forward, hooked up to a number of tubes.

 

“There is no way I’m getting in that thing,” Lotor said, “I won’t turn into a lifeless husk like you and Zarkon.”

 

“You don’t have a choice,” Haggar said, still turned from him, “you were foolish enough to bring your love here.”

 

Lotor stepped resolutely in front of Lance. “You’ve already tried to hurt me through him. The second you hit him, his lion will come and save him.”

 

Haggar stopped typing, and looked over her shoulder, eyes glowing and glowering. “Who said anything about hurting him?”

 

Lance and Lotor had just enough time for their blood to run cold as she lifted her hand and a dark purple light shot from her fingers, hitting Lotor square in the chest.

 

Lotor choked on his own breath, standing still and stunned. “Lotor?” Lance asked hesitantly. Lotor’s legs fell out from him and he tipped back. “Lotor!”

 

Lance tried to grab hold of him as he fell, but couldn’t hold him, and he landed hard on the ground. He clawed at his own chest plate, and so Lance ripped it off, pulling the under armor open down the chest to expose and angry dark spot of purple lightning. Lotor gasped for breath, staring up at Lance with wide shocked eyes.

 

“Lotor, Love, stay with me.” Lance cradled his head holding him up to his chest and touching the spot as though he could claw it off with his own fingers, “stay with me, baby,”

 

Lotor’s gasps became more labored. He opened and closed his mouth, willing his voice to come through, but no sound came out.

 

Lance whipped around to Haggar, baring his teeth as angry tears sprang up again. “You monster, he growled at her, “He’s your own son! What was all that about wanting to be a family again if you’re just going to kill him?!”

 

“If he won’t join me, I won’t have my family again,” she said, coldly, “If you want to save his life, there’s only one way now.” She motioned to the tank.

 

Lance looked to it...then back to Lotor. Even as he struggled to breathe, Lotor shook his head just slightly. One of Lance’s tears fell on his face, and Lance rubbed his cheek to wipe it away. “I’m sorry,” he said, grabbing him from under his arms. 

 

Lotor struggled against him, but in the end he couldn’t stop him from dragging him across the floor. “Lance,” A voice sounded in his ear. It was Keith, “What’s happening in there? Something’s happening with the rift.”

 

While he struggled to lift Lotor, he looked off to the left to see Haggar doing some weird magic with her hands. He didn’t pretend to understanding, but it was glowing in weird yellows and purples so he had to assume it wasn’t good. “Yeah,” He said between labored breaths. Lotor wasn’t light. “Safeguard J,”

 

“J?!” Allura screamed over the comms, “Isn’t that the safeguard that I didn’t want to have at all???”

 

“Uh-huh,” Lance said, heaving Lotor up to the tank. 

 

Allura continued to scream about something, but Lance had stopped listening. He took his helmet off, pulling the tank open and putting Lotor inside. He nearly tripped over him in the effort.

 

Lotor looked up at him, trying once again to push him away, but Lance held him down. Lotor groaned up at him, gripping his arms pathetically. “I know,” Lance said, “I know. Trust me,” he said looking into Lotor’s eyes and cradled his face. “It’ll be okay. Trust me.” Lotor squinted at him, trying to read him. Lance leaned in and captured his mouth with his own, Holding him and trying desperately to say a lot without saying anything. Lotor was a smart man. He’d understand.

 

Carefully Lance closed his armor back up, and put his own helmet on Lotor’s head, minding his hair as best as he could. “It’s gonna be okay, baby, he muttered, more to himself than Lotor, “I love you.”

 

Lance tucked Lotor’s legs inside as comfortably as he could and hate every inch of himself, he closed the door, with Lotor inside.

 

“You’re a coward, you know,” he said, glaring over his shoulder to look at Haggar, “Maybe you did love him once, but this? This isn’t love. You don’t trust him. You don’t respect him. You don’t even care about him outside of what you want from him.”

 

Haggar’s mouth twitched. “And you do?” 

 

Lance sneered. “I have more love in my left pinkie toe than you’ve had in 10,000 years.” He looked down at Lotor, who looked strangely helpless. “And so does he.”

 

Maybe Haggar just didn’t have a response to that, but she just raised her glowing hands, and the machine around the tank started whirring. Looking at the screens, Lance could see a glowing yellow light forming from the rift, growing, and funneling itself to Haggar’s ship. 

 

As soon as he lost sight of the end of light, a yellow liquid filtered into Lotor’s tank, flooding him around his legs. Lance pressed his hand against the tank, watching as Lotor’s eyes fluttered closed, the quintessence filtering in around him, and slowly, slowly lifting him up until he was floating, almost peacefully.

 

“It’s working,” Haggar said, watching from the side, “Come to me, my son.”

 

Lance watched Lotor open his mouth in a silent scream, pressing his head against the glass. “C’mon, Love. C’mon.” 

 

He felt a shiver run through him, but instead of being cold and unfriendly it was a welcoming trickle of energy, like a hand running up his spine. He shut his own eyes, holding onto that feeling, his thoughts and energy all focused on Lotor. 

 

Lotor’s eyes snapped open, glowing blue. Suddenly the golden liquid around him was swirling, a blue light leaking off of Lotor’s floating frame and saturating the gold until it was all a blue white light. 

 

“What?” Haggar demanded, “What is this?”

 

“He told you, Witch,” Lance said, smiling as his plan started to come together, “Prince Lotor will not be your puppet.”

 

1 dobash earlier:

 

“It’s gonna be okay, baby. I love you.”

 

That was the last sound Lotor heard before the tank closed, and shut out everything in the universe. He saw Lance moving his mouth and speaking, but it was nothing through the glass. He was left with the sound of his own breath and heartbeat, desperately trying to keep him alive despite the growing numbness in his chest.

 

“Lance, come in,” Keith’s voice said in his ears, “Lance! The rift is opening! Say something!”

 

“If he’s doing safeguard J, he might not have his communicator anymore,” Hunk’s voice said, “Lotor, is that you?”

 

Lotor opened his mouth, straining a breath, but couldn’t manage any noise beyond a groan. 

 

“Two quick breaths for yes,” Pidge’s voice said. 

 

Too weak to roll his eyes, or snark in anyway, he did as was asked. 

 

“Allura,” Keith said, “It’s all up to you now.”

 

He heard Allura sigh. “Alright….Lotor, listen to me very carefully. I’m going to teach you how to perform proper Altean magic.”

 

Despite no one being able to see him, his eyebrows went up in shock. He….wasn’t sure he was able to do it, really. He’d tried once at the rift, but it had failed. He knew druid magic, and even that he wasn’t experienced in. He thought it had to do with his Galran heritage interfering with the Altean side, which is why he needed ALLURA to do this, but...he didn’t exactly have the strength to argue, here. 

 

“I heard a bit of Haggar explaining the druid process to you,” she said, “And...it sounds similar, in general but...a bit more extreme. The first thing you do is take deep breaths, keep yourself as calm as you can.”

 

Easy for her to say. He closed his eyes but that didn’t stop him from hearing the tank opening, nor the feeling of liquid filling the tank around him. The raw quintessence tingled on his skin, slipping straight through his armor and clothes. Still, not being able to argue, he counted his breaths out keeping them as even as he could. 

 

“This next part should be easy. Reach out with your feelings, FEEL the quintessence around you. It’s just like what you do for druid magic, but DON’T touch anything yet. And don’t open your eyes”

 

The eyes closed was the only strange part, but seeing quintessence didn’t involve normal sight anyway. He reached with his own quintessence, using his emotions to feel, and--

 

It was 10 times, maybe 100 times more intense than anything he’d experienced reaching out with quintessence before. With the raw quintessence floating around him, or perhaps he floated in IT, it was like a wave of light. It was too much, too bright, too overwhelming. It stung in ways he didn’t even properly understand, as though his own life force was being burned by the sun.

 

“Hold on!” Allura shouted to him over the speaker. He must have made some scream of pain. “Lotor, listen to me, focus on my voice. Focus…..Focus on Lance. Feel his energy.”

 

Lotor groaned again, but did as asked, searching through the sea of light for Lance. After all his healing sessions, Lance was the most familiar energy to Lotor in the universe, more even than his own. Lance was as he always was, a deep well of hidden emotion, waves choppier than normal with concern and….and love, unbridled love. 

 

He reached out, just to feel that energy, feeling Lance shudder with the touch. Allura had said not to touch anything but….he couldn’t help it, not when it came to Lance. He didn’t want to change it anyway, just...be with it. That would be enough. 

 

The pain died down, and he was able to see--feel clearer around him. Close, too close, to Lance was an empty void, less than nothing, an energy that had once been a part of the universe but was now carelessly scooped out. That was the wi--his mother. No wonder she was an empty hole. It had been one of the first energies he’d read when learning druid magic, and now the void made sense. Still...there was something different now. A spark, an echo of what once was. 

 

He felt even further, and there, there were the other lions. One by one he identified, Pidge, Hunk, Keith...Matt, Sam, Shiro, and Coran on the Castle...Ezor, Zethrid, Acxa, and Allura on the Sincline. 

 

‘That’s it, that’s better,’ Allura’s voice echoed to him, more of a memory of a voice than a voice itself. ‘Now here’s where things get tricky: You need to give yourself over to the quintessence.’

 

He immediately recoiled and the pain returned 10 fold, all the energy around him suddenly a thousand harpoons, stabbing at him, and then pulling at him like his skin would fall apart. 

 

‘It’s the only way!’ Allura shouted, ‘Surrender to it! TRUST it! It’s the life force of the universe, it won’t hurt you unless you fight it!’

 

Lotor tried to calm his breathing again, but it was a bit hard to focus. Lotor liked control, he NEEDED control. Every time he’d lost it, he’d ended up near dead, or had lost something important to him. This was a lesson hammered in by his parents, by the druids, by the universe itself. Sometimes control of his own life was all he had.

 

But...Allura had asked him to trust it. Lance had asked him to trust him. He did trust Lance, with his thoughts...with his emotions...and now, apparently with his life. 

 

Slowly, he released control of himself, feeling his own energy slip into the cosmos. It wasn’t like the hard cudgel of Druid magic, pulling and pushing on other energies to shape it into his will. Instead his will itself melted away, being sapped up by the wall of light around him. It intermixed and mingled until he wasn’t sure how much of it was him and how much was the raw quintessence, and even though he wished to, he didn’t try and find the ends and beginnings. 

 

He opened his eyes, and instead of the yellow tinge the world always took when he looked with his quintessence, it was a blueish-white, a similar color to the way Allura’s quintessence looked to him. He felt no pain. He did not feel in control, did not feel strong. In fact, this was the weakest and most vulnerable he could remember ever being. But he was alive. And he was spread out. He was the quintessence itself. 

 

_ Now _ Allura said, voice so different it sounded like his own thoughts,  _ ask it. Nicely. _

 

Ask? Ask the quintessence? Saying what? Did it understand words?

 

_ Um _ he thought to the field of energy.  _ Please, um. Would you charge up the Sincline? _

 

Nothing more happened, and Lotor felt a twinge of doubt, followed quickly by a surge of pain. He focused again, trying to give himself up to the Quintessence again. He focused on the individual energies of all those around him, and this time focused in on Allura herself, or more specifically, what was around her. The Sincline was made of inter-dimensional rock, and in a way, it had a quintessence signature of it’s own, harder to understand, so alien and strange, it didn’t register like a person. It was something ancient, something mysterious, something...something that recognized him. He’d shaped it, after all, designed the ships himself. 

 

_ There _ he thought in no particular direction,  _ go there. Please.  _

 

The quintessence flooded up through him, and went in a direct line to the ship, a beam of pure energy. 

 

He felt Allura’s energy lift with joy as the Sincline filled with Quintessence. There was a flutter, a rush of activity between her and the generals as they prepared the weapon. Allura took a deep breath, her own nerves showing through. He touched her energy as well, feeling her shiver, but guiding her to do what she needed to use the controls. 

 

“AAAAAAAAAAAA”

 

Haggar shouted, and Lotor felt more than heard her pain. The void started to shrink, being consumed by the energy of the universe around it. He smiled to himself in unfiltered sadism and justice, glad that she could feel some of the suffering she had been the direct cause of. 

 

“It’s working!” Lance said, and this time instead of a faint echo he heard the words as though he were standing right beside him, “Come on, Lotor, keep it up!”

 

He intended to do exactly that, but as the beam continued to fire, he could feel the energy draining from him completely. With Allura’s experience, she needed a constant supply of energy to keep the weapon going, and being used as the conduit left him….hollow.

 

“The rift is becoming unstable again!” Coran said, “If we keep this up, we could be looking at another system-destroying event.” 

 

“Is anyone within the blast zone that needs to be evacuated?” Keith asked

 

“Yeah! Us!” Matt shouted. 

 

“We gotta get out of here!” Hunk said, “Coran, can you use some of Allura’s energy that’s saved up in the castle to make a wormhole?”

 

“Probably,” Coran replied. 

 

“Alright,” Keith commanded, “Everyone prepare to make the jump. Lance, get ready, I’m coming for you and Lotor.”

 

“NO.”

 

The voice sounded over the speakers was Allura’s, but Lotor’s mouth was moving. Their energies were so linked together they had become one form in two bodies, one charging, the other destroying, both echoing. 

 

“NO. NOT YET. WE CANNOT LEAVE UNTIL MY MOTHER IS DEAD.”

 

There was a brief pause, before Lance asked, “Lotor?”

 

“SHE IS ALTEAN,” Lotor/Allura said, “SHE WILL REVIVE IF WE LEAVE NOW.”

 

“Lotor, you’ll die,” Lance said, “We’ll ALL die. I’m looking at your readings right now, and they’re not good, you have to let us get you out of there.”

 

“NOT UNTIL SHE’S DEAD FOR GOOD,”

 

“Coran, open the portal, and keep it open as long as you can.” Keith ordered, “Take the castle and get through. Pidge, Hunk you go too. Generals, get into escape pods and get out of there.” There were general affirmations as they rushed to follow. 

 

He could sense Lance leaning against the container, and could almost feel the tears on his cheeks. “You’re burning up, Lotor.” Lance said, “I don’t think you can even feel it anymore, but look, look at yourself! Your armor’s cracked and shredded. Your skin--you’re skin’s practically melting! Please, love, please, we’ve done enough. Let me save you.”

 

“THIS IS WHAT I CAME TO DO,” Lotor said, “I KNEW THE RISKS. LET ME KILL HER.”

 

“Not at the sake of your own life!” Lance said. 

 

“IF THAT’S WHAT IT TAKES.”

 

“Lance….” Keith’s voice shouted, “I’ve got the Sincline in my claws, all I need is to come grab you, and we’ll rush through the wormhole.”

 

“I can’t leave him!” Lance shouted back, “I--I can’t I--”

 

The choppy uncertain energy around Lance shifted into resolute. Lance had decided.

 

“I’m so sorry,” Lance said, opening up the tank.

 

“NOOOOOOOOOO,” Lotor screamed, his energy separating from Allura’s and the universes until the voice was only his own. He was suddenly alone, and cold, and in so much pain. 

 

He caught glimpses of what was happening around him. Lance cradling him in his arms. Red’s mouth closing around him. Lights and explosions from outerspace, all calmed by the stillness of the wormhole. 

 

He heard Lance trying to say his name, to call him back, but even then he was fading….fading...fading into black.

 

Lotor? A voice echoed around him. Lotor!

 

And Silence.

  
  
  
  
  
  


.

..

…

….

…..

……

……..

“Lotor?”

 

His eyes flickered open. A shape was above him, blocking the light. He recognized the eyes first, gleaming blue, behind dark, dark lashes, a curved nose and tan cheeks and a mess of dark brown hair.

 

“L--” Lotor’s mouth opened but his voice disappeared. In less than a whisper he forced himself to get a word past his lips, the only word he could think right now. “Lance?”

 

A tear fell from Lance’s eye as he smiled down at him. “Babe!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there will be one last chapter to wrap things up, and then an epilogue. Is gonna be good.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lotor recovers and thinks about his future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last main chapter! Also longer than normal. I'm changing the rating to mature just to let you know

“How long was I out?” Lotor asked once his voice returned to him, somewhat. It was still croaky, and lifting his own arm was like hauling a meteor on a gravity-intense planet. 

“A couple movements,” Lance said, and Lotor was able to see the lines of worry on his face, the slight stubble on his chin, and the terrible condition of his skin in the face of neglect of his usual routine. “Coran was able to get the cryopods working after the first couple quintents, but. I don’t know, Allura said something about your quintessence itself needing to heal. I don’t really get it but….I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“‘Okay’ may be a few quintents away,” Lotor said, as he tried to adjust his postion, which involved a monumental effort. “But...I’m alive.”

Lance sighed, and nodded. “Yeah.” He swallowed, scooting his chair closer, “Are you...you know...mad at me?”

Lotor raised his eyebrow just slightly, an echo of his usual glance. “For saving my life?” Lance nodded. “I do understand. I would have done the same, if our positions were reversed. In fact, I did.”

Lance smirked to himself. “Yeah.” He sighed, leaving the room in silence for some dobashes. “Maybe…” he said, “Maybe she died when the rift exploded.”

“She didn’t.” Lotor said, calmly.

Lance frowned at him. “How can you know--”

“I just...I do.” Lotor said. “She’s alive out there.”

Lance’s frown deepend. “Like...an instinct or--”

“I can feel her,” Lotor said. “I think...I think I always could,” he gave a humorless laugh, “I suppose given recent revelations, that makes sense now.”

Lance winced. “She’s not your mother,” he said, “I don’t care about biology or things that may have happened 10,000 years ago, that witch---You’re not like her, Lotor. She’s not your responsibility.”

“I still want to do everything in my power to kill her,” Lotor said, “That’s been my goal, since the beginning, since I was practically a child. Her, and Zarkon too.” Lance closed his eyes, pained at Lotor’s words. “But,” Lotor continued, “I have a new goal as well.” With all his strength, he reached his fingers out towards Lance. 

Lance took his hands in his, and did Lotor one better, climbing up onto the medical bed and snuggling up against his side. “Two goals are good,” he said, “Nice reasonable number. Gives you something to do most of the time.” Lotor gave another pained laugh. Lance kissed his cheek. “Tell you what. Let’s stop it with the nearly-dying-and-then-sacrificing-ourselves-for-each-other thing though, hm? It’s getting a bit stressful.”

“Deal,” Lotor said, leaning as much as he could into Lance’s touch. He felt warm and...and safe. Even with how weak he was, he felt safe tucked beside Lance. 

Lance swallowed. “There...there is one more thing I have to tell you. And I don’t know how you’ll take it.” 

Lotor’s jaw clenched. What could it be? What else had gone wrong? What had happened while he was asleep?

Lance took his hand and rested it on top of Lotor’s head, brushing through Lotor’s hair…

Or rather, what was left of it. 

Lotor whined as the truth began to set in. He looked through his periphery, trying to get a glimpse of himself. No strands, no long locks lay on his shoulders. “What-what--”

“The quintessence kinda melted my helmet to your head,” Lance said. “Coran was able to fix the physical damage but...well.”

“Mirror!” Lotor demanded, and Lance nearly jumped out of his skin to reach for the mirror on the bedside table and show Lotor himself. Lotor whined again at the sight, his hair shortened to uneven, choppy chunks of white. They made his pointed ears look huge on his face. 

Lotor shook as he stared at the image of himself. “Nunvil. Now.”

“It’ll grow back naturally,” Lance said, “It’s really not that--”

“NOW!” Lotor tried to shout, but it didn’t work. 

Lance sighed. “I brought it up with Coran. It’s not good for your system right now. We’ll have to wait until you’re a bit better.”

Lotor scowled, hating the idea of looking like this for quintents. Lance threaded his fingers through what was left. “You know,” Lance said, “I think you could pull off this look.”

“I like it long,” Lotor said. “It’s part of my heritage as an Altean.”

Lance nodded. “Well...Alfor’s wasn’t this long,” He said, “Maybe you could...you know...look cute with short hair.”

Lotor glared up at him. “Shoulder length,” he said firmly, “no shorter.” Lance beamed at the very thought. “Is...is it possible to get some food?” he asked. 

“Of course!” Lance said, jumping into action, and Lotor was sorry he suggested it as it meant Lance left him, the space where he had been immediately chilled. “Here, give me just a few minutes. Rest up, and there’s a communicator beside you in case you need something,” He kissed Lotor’s forehead and ran out of the room. 

 

Lotor must have drifted off again as the next thing he knew, Lance was shaking him lightly. “Hey, babe, think you can get something down before you sleep.”

“Mmhmm,” Lotor hummed, eyes lidded. “I don’t, um,” He cleared his throat, “I don’t think I can...hold it though…” He hated this, he hated every second of not being able to care for himself, but Lance mercifully looked at him without pity, but rather a smile. 

“Don’t worry,” Lance said, “Here, this is romantic. Open up.” He sat at Lotor’s side, a bowl in one hand and a spoon in the other. Obediently, Lotor opened his mouth and Lance filled the spoon before putting it in Lotor’s mouth.”

Lotor hummed at the familiar taste, swallowing gratefully. “Is this...chicken noodle?”

Lance nodded, smiling, “Old family recipe. Best thing for getting you back on your feet.”

Lotor smiled back at him. “It’s my favorite.” 

Lance’s eyes glittered, and he reached down to peck him on the lips before feeding him another serving of the soup. 

 

***9y

 

Lotor had never seen Shiro like this, never expected him to sit before Lotor so lost and confused. “Haggar confirmed it to me,” he said solemnly, “You were---are--a clone of Takashi Shirogane, released after Zarkon’s fall, and sent as a spy and eventual sleeper agent for her.”

Shiro buried his face in his hands, sitting still as a statue. Keith and Lance looked sympathetically at him, the only ones Shiro….or the clone anyway...allowed to be there as he talked to Lotor. 

“The good news,” Lotor said, “And as shocking as this is, there is good news: Haggar did die, however briefly, when Allura and I used the weapon on him. During that time, all magical connections she would have had would have been severed, including yours. She would have to come into direct contact with you to try and regain that connection. So, at the least, your actions and thoughts are all your own, now.”

Shiro may have snorted at that. “They’re not, though, are they?” he said, “This...this is HIS body, HIS memories, HIS...his LIFE I’m living...I…” he cut himself off, getting into a staring contest with the ground. 

Keith cleared his throat. “So...the real--I mean, the other--Shiro, is he alive?”

Lotor sighed. “I’m not sure. Haggar didn’t mention. She may have him captured somewhere, or, he’s somewhere else entirely.”

Shiro nodded slowly to himself. Finally he stood, facing Keith. “With...with your permission, I’d like to take a pod and go out to find him. You’re busy with saving the universe and...and that’s what you should be doing. But I can’t go on pretending I’m him, not even if the Black Lion lets me. I certainly can’t lead Voltron.”

Keith looked like he was about to cry. Lotor would never have expected that from him, but Lance had told him of how he’d lost Shiro twice now. Here he was, not having lost him a third time, but rather finding out he’d never gotten him back. “Take care of yourself Shi--I mean, um…”

The clone bit his cheek. “Why don’t you call me...Ryou.” He said, “It was the name my---HIS parents almost gave him.”

Keith nodded. “It’s been good having you here...Ryou. Make sure to say something to everyone, they’ll want to hear about this.”

Ryou nodded back, clapping Keith on the shoulder the way Shiro always did, and left. 

Lance immediately came up to comfort Keith, but before he could, Keith ran out, probably so he didn’t cry in front of Lotor. Lance looked apologetically to his boyfriend. “Go,” Lotor told him, “He needs you.”

Lance nodded, blew him a kiss, and left. 

 

***

 

“Team Bonding Night!” Lance shouted, bursting into the medical ward. 

If Lotor was well enough to use his legs he might have fallen out of his bed with how surprised he was at Lance’s outburst. As it was, he had limited range of his arms and most of his torso so he may have flailed slightly indignantly. “What the--”

Soon enough, the rest of the team filtered into the room, Pidge carrying a strange assortment of items he didn’t recognize. “What’s going on?” 

“I told you, babe, team bonding!” Lance said, snuggling in beside him, “Since you can’t come down to the lounge, we decided to come to you.”

Lotor looked over the paladins, Matt, and Coran. Sam had left several quintents ago to return to Earth. Pidge, Matt and Keith were setting up the strange pieces from the case Pidge carried in, passing out disks and small plastic rectangles with pictures on them to everyone. Hunk and Coran were passing out snacks, and Allura….Allura was looking at him strangely. As though there was no hate behind her eyes. Allura never looked at him like that. “I see,” he said, looking at her especially suspiciously, “I….didn’t realize my presence was required at these functions.”

“Oh shut up and let us be nice,” Pidge said, “I can’t promise it’ll happen often, so enjoy it while you can.” She stuck the rectangles in his face.

Sighing, Lotor collected them. “So….what do we do with these?”

“It’s a game called 5 card draw!” Lance said, arranging the cards so Lotor held them properly, “We’ll go over the rules and do a few practice rounds, but the basic gist is about luck, and bluffing.”

“A game based all around lying?” Allura said, “How horrid!”

“It’s fun!” Keith said, “My dad taught me how to play as a kid, trust me, this will be great.” 

“I’ll be your dealer today,” Pidge said, putting on a strange visor, “Now, let the games begin. 

 

Once he got the hang of it, Lotor seemed to be having genuine fun, and as Lance predicted, was pretty good at the game. 

What he wasn’t expecting, though, was Coran’s ability to absolutely wipe the floor with them. “Intriguing!” He’d say as half the group was out of chips, “It’s similar to an old war game we used to play on our old ships, except the cards don’t explode when you lose here, of course.”

Horrified at that thought, Hunk suggested switching to a movie, and they brought out a TV set, crowding around Lotor’s bedside so everyone could see, Lance staying curled up on Lotor’s side. 

 

***

 

Lotor was finally capable of feeding himself, and was enjoying every second of it. He’d taken for granted having basic control over himself, and he now intended to relish in every moment of it.

Lance walked into the room, or rather, slinked inside, wearing his robe and walking in a careful way so that the robe rode up and showed off his legs. With Lotor recovering, Lance had resumed his self care routine, and Lotor could fully enjoy the sight of smooth, well lotioned, tan legs. “Well hello there,” he said, as Lance walked up.

“Hey, babe,” Lance said, sitting on the edge of the medical bed, the robe slipping a bit down his bare shoulder. 

Lotor’s mouth twitched up. “Kit, I still can only just move my legs,” he said, “I hope you don’t want to put me in a position where I’d have to turn you down.”

“Perish the thought,” Lance said, tracing his finger down Lotor’s shirt, “I just thought you might be bored sitting here. And besides, just because you can’t touch doesn’t mean you can’t look.”

Lance swung his leg over Lotor’s lap, letting the robe fall from his shoulders, slowly. Lotor drank in the sight of him. He still wore underwear, but that was it, and even that didn’t seem to cover much. 

Lance rolled his body into Lotor, touching up and down his chest and his legs as Lotor’s breath grew shallow and his eyes grew dark, watching him. Oh, what he wouldn’t give to flip them around and pin Lance to the medical bed, especially with the way Lance was grinding his hips against him and--

The door opened with a bang.

“Quiznak!” Lance shouted, “Coran, get out--!”

“I just came in to remind you that although he’s made significant progress, Lotor’s still not well enough for sexual activities.”

“GET OUT CORAN!” Lance yelled louder, trying desperately to cover himself with as much blanket as he could, sliding out of Lotor’s lap. 

“Alright!” Coran said, oddly cheerfully, “But let me know if you should--

“OUT!”

The door closed behind him, and Lance collapsed on the bed. “Oh shut up,” he sneered at his boyfriend, but Lotor simply could not stop laughing. 

 

***

 

Lotor woke up to a punch on the arm. “OW!” 

He blinked his eyes open, grabbing his hurt arm. He blinked his eyes open and tried to make out the shapes. “Zethrid?” He said. She stood beside Acxa, with Ezor on his other side. “What are you--”

Ezor punched him in the other arm.

“OW!” He screamed, “What in the--”

“Coran said you were healed up,” Zethrid said.

“So you decided to send me back to the cryopods?” Lotor said, glaring at them, “I thought you all returned to the Blade of Marmora.”

“We did,” Acxa said, failing miserably to hide her amusement, “Had a few things to wrap up with Kolivan, but Ezor and Zethrid wanted to get even.”

He frowned up at them. “Even?

“For the death of our best friend?” Ezor said, leaning over his bed with her hands on his hips. Despite her words, she didn’t seem overly antagonistic. 

The pain in his arms started dying down. “Ah,” He said, “So….this makes up for it?”

“No,” Zethrid said, crossing her arms, “But Acxa made a good argument for you about how Narti would agree it was the right decision. Even if we don’t.”

Lotor nodded. “I understand.”

“So,” Ezor said, “What’s next, Boss?”

Lotor frowned confused, “Next?”

“Did that quintessence do brain damage?”Acxa said, “Come on, we’ve got a giant superweapon that we know you can charge now. Without being dipped in quintessence this time, hopefully.”

“Or causing an explosion,” Ezor added.

“I dunno, the explosion was kinda cool,” Zethrid said. 

Acxa and Ezor snorted at her, while Lotor looked between the three of them. “You….you want me to lead you? To take on the Galra Empire with the Sincline?”

“Provided no more lying,” Zethrid said with a growl, “not to us, at least. We’re your confidantes, on everything.”

“That was always the plan, wasn’t it?” Acxa said, “So, what do you say? You finish resting up here, and then you’re finally free of staying under Allura’s thumb.”

There was a time, not so long ago, an idea like that...leaving the castle, being a leader again….fighting Zarkon and Haggar on his own terms...they wouldn’t have been able get him in a pod out of here fast enough.

Now...he had some things to think about.

 

***

 

He got the generals to leave saying he needed rest. Still, he got no sleep, just sat there, thinking.

“Hey babe,” Lance said, walking in and carrying something behind his back, “how’re you feeling?”

Lotor smiled as casually as he could, “much better, thank you,” he said, as Lance sat down by his hip and pressed a kiss to his lips. “What have you got?”

Lance blinked, overly innocent, “whatever do you mean?”

Lotor raised an eyebrow at him. Giggling, Lance took out a small thin box. “Open it.”

Suspicious, Lotor took it and did as asked. Inside was a beautiful jeweled necklace, with a blue and purple stone set as the pendant and glorious silver strands. Lotor smiled. “It’s beautiful,” He said, “what’s the occasion?”

Lance’s smile widened, “Well, I was looking at the calendar, and I realized...it’s our anniversary.” Lotor frowned, confused. “Humans like to celebrate important events on the anniversary from which they occurred. Like, us getting together.” He smiled sweetly. 

Lotor wracked his brain. “It...it can’t have been a year since our first date. Not yet.”

“Not our first date,” Lance corrected, “but it IS a year since a certain incident with you, me, a porn misunderstanding and a bowl of soup.”

Lotor grinned at the memory. “Ahh...ha,” he said, “and humans typically include anniversaries of one night stands?”

“They do if it becomes NOT a one night stand,” Lance said. “Or...maybe they don’t. But I wanted to give it to you.”

Lotor smiled. “Thank you,” He said, “of course, I have nothing for YOU, but—“

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Lance said, “I took care of it,” He untucked a matching necklace from his shirt. Lotor couldn’t hold back a laugh.

“You bought yourself an anniversary gift?” Lotor asked, laughing.

“Mmhmm,” Lance said, “don’t worry, I took it out of your GAC allowance.” 

Lotor snorted, “well, at least I know you’ll like it,” he joked, getting Lance to laugh with him. His laughter died away as he remembered his conversation with Acxa. “Listen, Lance, I need to talk to you—“

“You know, I was looking at your medical charts the other day,” Lance said, pretending Lotor hadn’t said anything, “I always kind of assumed you were basically like a human, but, ya know, purple and with pointy ears.”

Lotor frowned, unsure of where that thought came from. “Oh. Well, no we’re—“

“You’re heart for instance,” Lance said, “I mean, 6 chambers? Is that really necessary?”

“For my body, yes,” he said, “But Lance—“

“And it’s in a different PLACE too,” Lance said putting hi hand on the center of Lotors chest, “right here…” he leaned down and put his ear right on Lotors chest. “Ba-ba-bump. Sounds different.”

Lotor put his hand in Lances hair, lightly petting it. “Are you trying to distract me, love?”

Lance hesitated, then, nodded.

“You know what I’m going to say?” Lotor asked.

Lance nodded again. “Acxa told me. She...she’s very convincing, just like you. I think she likes you a lot. Like in a friend way.” He swallowed, “She seemed pretty certain you wouldn’t go unless you had my permission.” 

Lotor blinked. “Well, I want to talk about it. Not sure if that’s the same as asking for permission.”

Lance wrapped his arms around him, lifting his head to rest his chin on his chest. “Would you go? If it weren’t for me?”

Lotor hesitated for only a moment before he nodded. Lance took a deep breath. “Okay. You should go then.”

“Lance—“

“I’m not going to hold you back from something you want,” Lance said, what kind of shitty boyfriend would I be if I did that?”

“One that wants your boyfriend to stick around,” Lotor said, tucking his hair behind his ear.

“Of course I want you around,” Lance said, “But...but you have to admit, you’ve been unhappy here.”

“Not completely,” Lotor said, getting Lance to smile.

“I mean,” lance said, taking his hand, “you’ve been bored cooped up here. You like being in command yourself, and what are you going to do if you stay? Come out every once in a while on a diplomatic mission in disguise? Sit and wait for me to come back from missions? This is your chance.”

“Those are Acxa’s words,” Lotor said. “What do you think?”

Lance sighed. “I think I’ll miss you,” He said, “But..I think we can handle it.” He threaded their fingers together. “You’ll still probably dock at the castle. And we’ll go on missions together, and Acxa mentioned maybe getting Allura to install a teleduv on the Sincline and teaching you how to make wormholes, and—“

Lotor put a hand on his cheek. “I’ll miss you too. So much.”

Lotor caught a tear before it fell down Lance’s cheek. “I—“ Lance said, “I want you to be happy,”

“I am,” he said, cradling Lances cheek.

“We’ll talk all the time,” Lance said, leaning up as tears started coming more and more, “and we’ll see each other in person. And it’s only for as long as the war anyway, so—“

Lotor pulled him up for a kiss. “We’ll figure it out. We’ll figure it all out, together. Even if we’re not together all the time.”

Lance nodded, kissing him again and letting Lotor hold him. “Here, uh,” Lance said, sniffling, “there’s another part of the gift,” he took out the necklace and twisted the jewel a quarter turn. A picture of Lance and Lotor from their 3rd/4th date, a picnic in a nebula, was projected out of the gem.

“I’ve got one on mine too,” Lance said, “actually, I put a few in there, you can change it with each turn,” he clicked the gem a bit further, and the picture changed to them snuggled together on movie night. Lotors face was frowned on concentration on the film, while Lance was chuckling at him, amused.

“I love it,” Lotor said. “Here, help me,” 

He clicked the photos off, and opened the clasp, letting Lance wrap his hands around his neck, pushing aside his hair. As promised, he’d kept it to shoulder length, in gentle layers. He wasn’t planning on cutting it again, though, so it would eventually grow back out. 

“I love you,” Lance said, keeping his arms wrapped around of him.

“And I love you.” Lotor said, pressing his forehead against his. “So much.”

 

***

 

It took another movement before Lotor was deemed healthy enough to head out with Sincline. The Paladins grouped together to say goodbye to them. Keith kept his farewell to Lotor brief. “Your generals are good soldiers. Don’t screw up with them.”

Lotor nodded. “I won’t.” 

Keith nodded in return, going to talk with Acxa, who he actually cared about.

Matt and Pidge came up to him together. “We’ve added as many modifications to the Sincline as we could, and we’ve tested out the new teleduv, it should work well,” Pidge started.

“You should still probably give us regular updates for a while, and come back for check-ups just in case anything goes wrong,” Matt said. 

“Aw, Holts, you two actually want me to come back.” Lotor said, teasing.

Pidge punched him in the arm. “Don’t be stupid,” she said, fixing her glasses. “Just..be careful and stuff. I don’t wanna have to come save your ass again.”

Lotor nodded at him, and they stepped back, letting Coran step up, smiling solemnly. “I knew your mother, you know. Before, I mean.” Lotor tensed at the mention of her. “You are a lot...a lot like how she once was.”

Lotor clenched his jaw. “I do not want to be like her.”

Coran clapped his shoulder, like a father might to his son. “Then learn from her mistakes.” Lotor blinked at him, unsure of what to say. He’d never really had a mentor figure before. 

Coran stepped aside for Allura. “Lance said something to me...and it didn’t really click until our quintessences mixed,” she said, “but you...you really are one of the few Alteans left. And that’s something I’ve missed, having other Alteans around.” She took a deep breath. “Anyway, what I mean is...next time you come by, would you be willing to teach me what you know of magic? I would be willing to teach you in return, and maybe we can figure out more together. And maybe we can go over some other Altean traditions, if you'd like.”

Lotor blinked in surprise. “I...certainly,” He said, “I’m looking forward to it.”

She marched away, and Hunk came up, giving him a hug. “I’m gonna miss you, buddy,” he said, as Lotor tried to figure out what to do. 

Awkwardly, Lotor patted him on the back. “I’ll miss you too, uh, Hunk.” 

Hunk gave him a final squeeze before releasing him. “Take care of yourself.”  
Lotor nodded. 

There was only one more. Lance came up to him, face much calmer than what he felt, Lotor could tell. “Hey baby,” he said calmly. They’d done most of their mushy goodbyes already last night, along with some other stuff. Still, this was the moment that was hardest. “Do me a favor,” Lance said, holding his hand. Lotor nodded. “Shrink down for me, would you?”

Lotor frowned, but Lance kept looking at him, so he shrank down until they were almost equal height. Lance put a hand on his hip, another on his shoulder, and twirled him until he was properly dipped in Lance’s arms. 

Lance gave him a long, sweet kiss, which Lotor returned gratefully, until he heard a wolf whistle behind him. Looking, he saw it was Ezor. He was finally let go and pushed towards his ship, “Go get ‘em babe,” Lance said with a smile.

Lotor nodded. “I’ll call you. Tonight if I can.”

Lance’s nodding grew faster, and Lance saw tears in his eyes. “Go,” he ordered. 

Ezor, Acxa, and Zethrid followed him on board, and he gave one last look before the ship doors closed behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this seems kind of sad but there is an epilogue which....i think you're gonna like. It takes the form of more of the old oneshots


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lotor comes to visit the Castle of Lions between missions.
> 
> The visit doesn't go quite the way he was expecting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS DONE
> 
> Hoooooly crap guys. Remember when I didn't even really ship Lancelot? and then I wrote a silly oneshot anyway, and now it's a novel-length series? What? 
> 
> This has been such fun to write, and WAY out of my comfort zone for what I normally write. Hence why this nsfw series is on an account literally with 'anon' in the name. But I mean this sincerely, there's no way I wouldn't have gone through with it all if it werent for your amazing comments that keep me going for DAYS. I read them over and over, every single one, and if I didn't respond to one of yours, I still read it over and over, just on my email, and it was probably from an earlier fic that I didn't go back to to respond...to...trust me, it makes sense. having multiple ao3 accounts is confusing. 
> 
> So, here it is! I hope you enjoy this has been such a ride.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” Ezor said, piloting her ship.

“Well that’s never good,” Zethrid joked, piloting the ship beside her.

Ezor activated the visual comms just to blow a raspberry at her. “SO I’VE BEEN THINKING,” She said, louder, “We should get titles.”

“What kind of titles?” Lotor asked, curious. He was the only one not to get a pilot’s seat, sitting instead at the teleduv controls. Acxa glared at him from her pilot’s chair for encouraging her.

“Like, ‘the Voltron Paladins,’” She said, “Something that resonates authority and strength.”

“We’re generals,” Acxa said, “Is that not good enough?”

“We’re kinda not, though,” Ezor said, “Lotor doesn’t have an army anymore, so we can’t be generals if there’s no army.”

“Thanks,” Lotor said sarcastically.

“I’m just thinking,” Ezor continued “A really cool title can set us apart. Like….the Dominators.”

“Okay, I actually like that one,” Zethrid said.

“Isn’t it a little...forceful?” Acxa asked, “I mean, we’re not on the Empire’s side anymore.”

“Yeah, but that’s how the Galra will know to take us seriously,” Ezor said, besides, don’t you think it’d be cool to be called ‘Dominator Acxa’?”

Acxa shuddered, and Lotor barked out a laugh. Acxa quickly turned their audio off and glared back at him. “Being in a relationship has been terrible for you.”

“Don’t be jealous,” he said, “If YOU want to be in a relationship, all you have to do is talk to her.”

“Are you really going to give me advice here?” Acxa said, “Like, really?”

Lotor shrugged, “Well, which one of us is in a committed romantic relationship and which one is hopelessly pining?”

She scowled. “I liked you better when you were emotionally distant.”

Lotor chuckled. Whatever Acxa preferred, Lotor liked the new dynamic he had with his generals. Pilots. Whatever they were going to be called now. They were definitely friends, and it worked well for while they were out destroying druids. Haggar had gone underground and even Zarkon was too heavily guarded...for now.

He wished Narti could see them now.

Of course it wasn’t perfect, and even when they were all happy and getting along, eventually Lotor would get anxious and irritable and conveniently, Acxa would schedule a stop at Lion Castle for around that time. As irritated as she tended to act towards him, he wasn’t sure what he’d do without her.

“Make a wormhole already,” Acxa said, “Your more obnoxious than usual, which generally means I need to dump you in your boyfriend’s lap and take a vacation.”

Lotor smiled, and created the wormhole, trying not to appear too eager. He and Lance had seen plenty of each other over the past few months, both during Lotor’s visits and whenever they called. He’d met Lance’s parents over the video link Sam Holt had managed to set up, celebrated Lance’s birthday, their ‘actual’ anniversary, and just a lot of other normal dates. As soon as he left or hung up, though, he was already looking forward to the next time. Still, he felt the need to argue, “You like him too, admit it.”

“He’s a good paladin,” Acxa said, “He keeps you occupied, which is useful. Though he did challenge me to a shooting contest, which was...odd.”

“A shooting contest?” Lotor asked, confused. “Who won?”

She glared at him. He took that for his answer.

They emerged from the wormhole to see Lion Castle. Lotor couldn’t help the smile that crossed his face. “Hail them,” he said, keeping his voice steady and professional.

Acxa pressed a button. “Lion Castle, this is the Sincline. Permission to board?”

“Permission granted,” Coran’s voice said, “Welcome back, Sincline.”

The three ships boarded into a docking bay that had been designated for the Sincline ships. Lotor saw a small crowd sitting at the doors, waiting to welcome them. 

Lotor was the first out of the ramp, walking towards the group, more specifically, the blue eyed, brown haired man in front. 

Hunk whispered something in Lance’s ear, and Lance stepped forward, smirking. “Hello,” He said innocently, as he intercepted Lotor.

Lotor smiled back. “Hello.”

Lance bit his lip, standing as much into his personal space as he could without touching. “How was your mission?”

“Good, good,” Lotor said, leaning over him. “Very successful. And your own?”

“Very successful as well,” Lance said, slowly leaning up, “Well, welcome back.”

“Thank you,” Lotor responded, mere inches away from his lip.

“Oh, for fucking quiznak,” Acxa said, passing them, “Princess, he’s going to be useless until he gets laid, might we push our debrief until morning? In the meantime, I’d like a warm meal.”

Lotor looked over Lance’s head to glare at her. “Remember when you used to treat me with respect and fear?”

“No,” She said over her shoulder as Zethrid and Ezor followed her, Ezor giggling all the way. 

“Certainly you can join us for dinner,” Allura said, “it should be ready soon, please, you may follow me to the dining hall.”

“Thank you, princess,” Zethrid said, standing tall and following surprisingly close on Allura’s footsteps. “We’re uh...we’re...we’re…”

“Honored,” Ezor said, “Is what I think my companion is trying to say.” Zethrid nodded, and they thought they could see a blush beneath her fur.

Confused, Allura led the crowd away, leaving Lance and Lotor alone. “Zethrid and Allura?” Lance asked Lotor with an eyebrow raised.

Lotor shrugged. “Zethrid hasn’t met many women who are as strong or stronger than herself. I think she may have a slight infatuation.”

Lance smirked. “Zethrid with a crush. Who would have thought?”

Lotor reached up and lightly grabbed his chin. Lance froze at his touch, as Lotor gently angled his face up to line up with Lotor’s. “Why don’t we save those thoughts for another time?” 

Lance’s eyes half-closed, and he stood on his toes as Lotor pulled him in for a gentle kiss.

 

By the time they reached their shared room, Lance’s shirt had ridden up nearly all the way, and his pants were undone. Lotor’s armor, meanwhile came clattering to the floor, undersuit quickly being unzipped. 

Lotor all but threw Lance on the bed, hardly letting him bounce on the mattress before Lotor was on top of him, lips crashed together and hands pinning him down.

Lance moaned as Lotor wrestled him completely out of his shirt. Lotor kissed down his neck, allowing Lance to breath heavily, wrapping his arms around Lotor and holding his hair. “Oh god I missed you,” he gasped out, “God, I missed you so much.”

Lotor hummed his agreement, not willing to lift his mouth from Lance’s smooth skin to answer properly. He made his way down his chest, leaving a trail of marks in his wake. Lance tugged on his hair, making a mess of it as he descended over the concave of his ribs and the soft folds of his stomach.

Lotor squeezed his hands between Lance and the bed to grab at the band of his jeans and pull them down over the curve of his ass, revealing him in his full glory, a sight for Lotor to truly behold.

Something caught Lotor’s eye, a small tab sticking out of Lance’s hole. He looked up at Lance, eyebrow raised. Lance gave a small shrug, “Wanted to be fully prepared,” he said.

Lotor smirked and sank between Lance’s legs, grabbing and pulling apart Lance’s thighs until his face was between his cheeks, closing his fangs around the tab. Once he was sure of his grip, he pulled, Lance’s hole widening to release the large bead stuck in him.

It took a strain on his fangs to tug the string of beads out of him, but it was worth it to see Lance absolutely melting above him, eyes heavily lidded and mouth in a perfect ‘o’ as he moaned low and dirty. And then there was watching Lances hole fluttering right before him.

The beads went crashing to the floor, and Lotor dived in, not letting the hole close any further, but pushing it open with his tongue. He tasted the lube Lance had used, Lotors favorite, as he pushed inside getting his opening nice and wet.

“Oh god, babe,” Lance moaned, wrapping his thighs around Lotors ears, “I’m already ready, please just—please just fuck me!”

Lotor lifted his head with a lewd noise, and grinned down at him, pupils blown wide. “Are you sure?” He asked, teasing.

Lance gasped for breath, reaching up to try and pull Lotor down. “Please, my Prince. Please.”

“How do you want it?” He growled, leaning up to kiss along Lance’s neck, shedding the remainder of his armor.

Lance scratched along his back, making him positively growl, “fast and hard, my prince.”

Lotor grinned, biting down on his neck as he lined up and slid in as fast as Lance could handle. “Mm,” Lance said, wrapping his legs around Lotor and locking his feet together, “more.”

Lotor thrust as hard and deep as their positions would allow, but got a lot more traction staying buried and moving inside of Lance, brushing up against his prostate over and over.

Lance was already a desperate mess beneath him, sweaty, hair in disarray. Lotor kisses him full on the mouth. “I missed you,” he whispered against Lotors lips.

“Mmm,” Lance replied, kissing back eagerly, “I missed you too.”

“I love you,” Lotor said, still moving inside him, even as he stroked his face “love you so much...thought of you every day,”

“Me too,” Lance Mumbled, hands everywhere in Lotors hair, “me too, everyday. Love you so much,”

Lotor’s foot got caught in the mess of sheets. He tried shifting to adjust, but that only sent the sheets over the edge of the bed, dragging Lotor with it, who in turn pulled Lance.

As they fell, Lotor twisted, trying to make sure Lance landed on him instead of the reverse. Still, the landing was hard, Lance sprawled over top of him, with Lotor still buried inside him. “You okay?” Lotor asked, making sure before he made any attempt to fix them.

Lance had other ideas. Carefully adjusting himself, he straddled Lotor properly, bracing himself on his chest and thrust himself onto Lotor’s cock.

Lotor let out a moan of his own, arching his neck so his head lay on the ground. “Oh kit,” he muttered, as Lance thrust again, setting up a rhythm, “oh quiznak…”

Lotor put his hands on Lance’s, taking one and bringing it to his mouth to kiss the knuckles. He sat up, holding Lance’s back so he didn’t fall, and rested his back against the bed. Lance’s arms went to rest on his shoulders, grinding more than thrusting now.

“You are so…” Lotor said, “so beautiful.”

Lances smile was sweet, almost shy. “Love you,” he muttered, kissing him. Lotor responded eagerly, hands threading through Lance’s hair.

They lost themselves in the ecstasy of each other, limbs of tan and purple tangled together. Lotor let his tongue explore Lance’s mouth just as his cock explored inside Lance. Finally, he heard Lance take a few quick breaths and felt something spill on his stomach, even as it was pressed against Lance.

As Lance tightened around him, he let himself release as well, never letting go of Lance’s lips until he was spent. Only then did he lean his forehead against Lance’s, letting their breaths mingle together, quietly enjoying the glow.

Lotor kicked out his leg that was still stuck in the sheet. “This is why you need to make the bed before I come over,” he muttered.

Lance huffed a laugh. “But we’re only going to mess it up again.”

Lotor groaned in disapproval, but Lance appeased him with a sweet kiss.

 

Once they’d fully cleaned up, it was clear that Lance had something on his mind. 

They’d set up a table and chairs to eat at, part of their tradition being to eat just the two of them the first night when Lotor came back, and Lotor refused to eat on the bed. 

Still, Lance was oddly quiet, letting Lotor carry the conversation. It was unusual and...uncomfortable. “Something on your mind?” He finally asked.

Lance blinked, broken out of his thoughts. “Hm?”

“You’ve been pushing around the same goo for a few dobashes.”

“Oh,” Lance said, quickly eating the dab of goo. “Sorry, just...got lost in thought.”

“Clearly,” Lotor said calmly, but inside his gut was twisting. “It’s alright to tell me, you know.”

Lances eyes went wide, all but confirming Lotors suspicions. “T-tell you?”

Lotor stared down at his plate. “I know the distance has been hard for you. And...and I’ve been busy so it’s been longer and longer between my visits.” He grit his teeth, letting his hair fall into his face, “If you want to break up, I assure you, I won’t throw anything at you this time. I promise.” 

“Baby!” Lance said, jerking up out of his seat, “No, no, nonono,” He said, settling on Lotor’s lap and pushing his hair back behind his ears, “I’m not breaking up with you, my god,” He said, cradling Lotor’s face until he was forced to look up at him. “I swear, I’m not. Kinda….kinda the opposite, actually.”

Lotor’s relief was immediately overwhelmed by confusion. “What do you mean?”

Lance sighed, realizing what he’d said. “Wait here,” he said, getting up and heading for his drawers, “I have something for you.” 

Lotor frowned, watching him go through it. “It’s not our anniversary...or our Other anniversary….” they had ended up deciding to celebrate both the anniversary of the first time they hooked up, and their first date.

“Nope,” Lance said, grabbing something. 

“It’s not my birthday,” Lotor said, thinking, “I know this because I don’t have one…”

“We still need to fix that,” Lance said, coming back, holding something behind his back. 

“Will you just tell me what I forgot?” Lotor asked.

“You didn’t forget anything, babe,” Lance said, taking his arm and leading him to the bed, “Just calm down and accept your gift.”

Lance put a canister in his hands, which Lotor frowned at. Carefully, he opened it to reveal a viscous shiny white liquid. Lance was looking at him expectantly, but...Lotor wasn’t entirely...sure what to do with it. 

Carefully, he sniffed it. “Scentless. That’s a bit unusual for you, isn’t it?” 

Lance looked at him like he grew a second head. “What?”

Lotor swallowed, not liking the feeling of uncertainty. “Usually when you give me lotion you give me some scent that you like. So, it’s just a bit unusual.”

Lance gave a short laugh. “Babe,” he said giggling, “it’s not lotion. It’s face paint.” That definitely confused Lotor. “Altean ceremonial face paint?”

Lotor swallowed, “I’m...not familiar with all my people’s traditions.” 

Lance’s eyebrows went up. “Oh I--I’m sorry, I--” He cleared his throat. He took Lotor’s hand, “Coran and Allura were explaining it to me. It’s marital face paint.”

Lotor heard the words, but didn’t process the meaning. 

Lance smiled nervously at him. He dipped a finger in the paint and lifted it to Lotor’s cheekbone, “You see, for an engagement, the couple will paint each other’s faces with this stuff,” he moved to the other cheekbone, “And it’ll fade as it dries, but after a few days, during the wedding ceremony,” Lance finished up and wiped his finger on a towel, “the couple goes under a blacklight, and it shows off all their markings.”

Lotor still wasn’t processing. “We…” he started, “Did you...did you say ‘wedding?’”

Lance nodded, grabbing a hand mirror on the side table, showing Lotor’s face. Lance had drawn two Altean markings on him. His brain still wasn’t processing. “So?” Lance asked. 

Lotor frowned at him confused. He just noticed how Lance was shaking like a leaf. “So…” he repeated, dumbly.

“So, will you marry me?” he asked, tears coming to his eyes. 

Lotor was still blinking blankly. Everytime a thought started it simply didn’t finish, like he was frozen in quintessence, not entirely sure if what around him was really happening or--”

“You know, the whole bug-eyed disbelief thing is cute,” Lance said, still shaking, “but, I was kinda really nervous about all this and, if you could just get back to me as soon as you--”

“Yes,” Lotor said, reality shifting into place all at once. Now it was Lance’s turn to stare bug-eyed in disbelief. “Yes, of course, I--”

Lance cut him off with a kiss, holding him tightly “Oh my god,” Lance said against him, absolutely sobbing, “oh my--”

“Why are you crying?” Lotor asked, despite the fact tears were welling up in his own eyes, “You asked me,”

“I don’t know!” Lance said, “I wasn’t sure! I mean, I didn’t--oh my god--”

Lotor kissed him again, cradling his face. 

Lance kissed back, but then hurriedly pulled away, “Careful, careful, don’t want the paint to smudge,” Lance said, getting a notepad, “You have no idea what I had to go through to get this stuff. They do not make Altean ceremonial paint anymore, so Coran and I went on a trip trying to find and process these weird rare berries on a spider planet,” He shivered, “Anyway, Allura helped me pull up some designs that might be useful, they’re supposed to be symbolic of the couple’s journey together, so, this one is like ‘a slow fall into love,’ and this one is for ‘love in time of war’ and this one--”

Lotor took a swipe of the paint and drew a mark on Lance’s cheek. Lance blinked rapidfire in surprise. He grabbed the mirror and looked at what Lotor had done. “Did you just draw a heart on my cheek?”

Lotor smiled at him. Well, he couldn’t really seem to stop smiling now. That was something he’d never really experienced before. “Well,” he said, “Your human cartoonish depiction of a heart that you’re so fond of, yes,” he said. Lance blushed a bright red, smiling like a loon. “Tell me more about the ceremony,” he said, grabbing more paint to cover Lance’s face. 

“Well,” Lance said, grabbing paint for himself as well, “I thought it could be a bit of a mesh of cultures, like us. For Galra, We've each already done the courting duels, you fighting Keith--yes I found out about that--and my contest against Acxa,"

"That's why you challenged Acxa?" Lotor asked, things clicking into place. 

"Yes! Keep up! Lance said, doing something on the bridge of Lotor's nose, "I’m going to say a hard ‘no’ to people coming at us and fighting after the vows, but maybe we can eat some Haktra.”

Lotor made a face, “I never really liked Haktra. What about wearing the Kosiq?”

Lance hummed in thought, “Never really pictured myself getting married in a robe….”

“It’s a warrior’s tunic,” Lotor said, “and I think you’d look cute in one.”

Lance smirked. “Alright. That's going to make the Altean dance a bit tricky, but if we practice we should be able to manage. Coran’s been showing me some, he’ll be sure to show you as well.”

“Sounds like...an experience,” he said.

“Well get good, babe, we gotta do it in near pitch darkness for the marks to show properly.” He smiled painting a set of curved lines along Lotor’s jaw. “And for human...we’ll have both our families there.”

“Uh,”

“Not biological,” Lance said, rolling his eyes, “Well...mine will be calling in over video. Mom’s a little pissed we’re not going to Earth but I talked her down, I think. I meant all our friends and stuff. And Allura’s agreed to officiate as the sort-of-captain of the ship. Plus I thought maybe we could get some rings.”

Lotor got a mess of paint on his fingers, cradling Lance’s face in his hands, and leaving behind fingerprints. “Sounds perfect,” he said, bringing Lance’s face to his to kiss him again, smudging some of the perfectly placed paint, but not entirely caring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! I'll also answer questions about the world of this and stuff, should you like.


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